Half A Heart
by sparkle7311
Summary: How can a man survive with half a heart? Rest assured, things are not what they appear to be.
1. Chapter 1

**Half A Heart**

 **How can a man go on with only half a heart? This story is not what it seems.**

 **A/N: This was an original idea by Kristy Brumley on the Starsky and Hutch Fan Group on Facebook.**

 **CHAPTER ONE**

It was a beautiful, sunny day in southern California. The kind of day to forget everything and spend an afternoon at the beach. The temperature was in the high eighties even though it was still early in the morning, and the sky was relatively free from smog. Despite the attraction of other activities, for Starsky and Hutch the job came first.

The squad room was in disarray because it was being painted. The long tables that were normally used as desks had been folded and leaned up against the walls, and tarps were spread everywhere. One painter stood on a ladder covering a wall with the same obnoxious green that most institutional facilities seemed to favor. A second painter was sitting in a corner eating an early lunch. Someone had pulled the ping-pong table from the break room into the squad room. To pass time until they got a call, Starsky and Hutch were indulging in a game of "Trivia" Ping-Pong. The loser had to buy the winner a three-course meal at a restaurant of their choice. It had been a close game, but Starsky had managed to score the winning point.

The two detectives left the squad room arguing good-naturedly about Starsky winning the bet. As they left the building through the rear door that opened into the parking lot behind the station, Starsky said with a smirk,

"You owe me a dinner, buddy boy."

"Well, a bet's a bet," Hutch agreed, as the two men walked past a row of black and white cruisers parked along the side of the building and started to cross the lot to the Torino.

"All right!" Starsky gloated gleefully. He had expected Hutch to put up more of an argument.

"Hey, look….as long as I'm buying, why don't we pick a date? How about tomorrow?" Hutch suggested

"Tomorrow? Sounds great."

"How about five in the morning?" Hutch said with a grin as he stepped around to the passenger's side of the car and waited patiently for Starsky to dig his keys out of his skin-tight jeans.

"No way," Starsky told him. "You owe me a three-course dinner."

"What? Hamburger, fries and a chocolate shake, huh?" Hutch teased him affectionately.

"No way," Starsky told him defensively. "I'm talking about a broiled lobster, maybe, or a New York Steak."

"Come on. Hurry up," Hutch said, impatiently waiting for Starsky to unlock the car doors.

"What's your hurry?" Starsky asked as he fumbled with his keys. "It's not every day you can buy your best friend a three course meal." He flashed a grin at Hutch over the roof of the Torino.

Hutch's attention was drawn to the sound of metal scraping against metal. He glanced over towards the building in time to see a black and white cruiser pull forward, the rear quarter panel hitting the front fender of the cruiser parked beside it. The blond watched as the barrel of a gun suddenly appeared in the window on the passenger's side of the cruiser.

"STARSKY!" Hutch screamed frantically, reaching for his own weapon and automatically dropping to his knees beside the body of the Torino. "GET DOWN!"

Gunshots filled the air, followed by the sound of shattering glass and bullets slamming into the metal body of the Torino. Tires squealed shrilly as the cruiser accelerated and roared out of the parking lot. Hutch fired three shots after the retreating vehicle, but it was moving too fast for his aim to be accurate. Bouncing to his feet, it suddenly registered in his mind that he hadn't heard any answering gunfire from Starsky's weapon.

"STARSKY!" he yelled desperately as he shot another round at the fleeing cruiser. "STARSK!" he shouted again, his voice even more frantic when he didn't get an answer from his partner. His heart pounded with fear, slamming against his chest like a sledge hammer. Dropping his weapon to his side, he ran around the front of the Torino and stopped dead.

Hutch felt the color draining from his face, and he felt like he'd been hit in the stomach with a wrecking ball. His partner and best friend lay crumpled on the ground beside the car, his body curled in a fetal position with his head resting in the rear wheel well. Blood was rapidly pooling on the ground beneath him, pouring from wounds in his chest and abdomen. Starsky had been caught in the direct line of fire, trapped on the driver's side of the car with no place to hide.

The parking lot broke into chaos as other officers came running out of the building attracted by the sound of gunfire. Hutch didn't even notice the shouts and curses that filled the air as he slumped down to the ground beside his fallen partner. He was afraid to touch Starsky, afraid of what he would find. Then instinct took over and his trembling fingers reached out to press against the side of Starsky's neck, searching frantically for a pulse. He found one, but it was weak and erratic.

Gently, Hutch eased Starsky's head and shoulders into his lap, using his hands to press down against the terrible wounds in his chest, trying to stop the blood pouring out of his body. Other officers had arrived at the scene and were frantically trying to help, pressing jackets and bare hands against the wounds to slow the loss of blood. Hutch heard someone yelling that an ambulance was on the way, but his attention was focused solely on his partner who could be dying right in front of his eyes.

Starsky's face was pale, his eyes were closed, and his breathing was shallow and labored. Blood ran from the corner of his mouth in a frothy foam that indicated a direct hit to his lung. Hutch could hear the gurgling sound deep in Starsky's chest as he struggled to draw in each breath. He'd heard that sound too many times in his career. It meant that Starsky was drowning in his own blood as it filled his lungs.

"Please God…." Hutch whispered, the tears that burned his eyes beginning to fall down his cheeks. "Not now….not like this. Don't die on me, Starsk. Please don't die…" Hutch knew Starsky's fate rested in the hands of a much higher

power now.

"The ambulance should be here soon," someone that Hutch didn't bother trying to identify said.

"Starsky's tough," another person commented. "He'll make it. You'll see."

The wail of an approaching ambulance drowned out the voices around him. The sound was cut off abruptly as the ambulance pulled into the parking lot. The emergency vehicle screeched to a halt a few feet away, and two paramedics jumped out, running to the fallen man lying on the pavement. Hutch felt hands on his arms, trying to pull him away from his injured partner.

"Come on, son…let the paramedics take care of him now," Captain Dobey's voice said soothingly as he tried to pull the tall blond to his feet.

"NO! HE NEEDS ME! I HAVE TO STAY WITH HIM!" Hutch yelled, trying to fight the hands that pulled at him insistently.

Reluctantly, Dobey gestured for assistance, and three other officers stepped forward to help pull Hutch away from Starsky's side. Hutch cried out in despair and struggled against the hands that held him, hands that pulled him to his feet and away from Starsky. Dobey held Hutch's arm firmly, holding him back and keeping him from falling back on his knees beside his partner.

"Let them do their job, Ken," Dobey said quietly, his own eyes watering with tears at the tragedy unfolding in front of him. Like every other officer gathered there he knew that Starsky's chances of survival were slim at best. Starsky was losing too much blood much too quickly. His body was torn apart by the bullets.

The paramedics worked rapidly to access Starsky's condition and to stabilize him for transport to the hospital. Time was of the essence. An oxygen mask was put over his nose and mouth, and IV's were started. Pressure dressings were slapped over the wounds to prevent both blood loss and to keep air from getting into the chest cavity. An EKG monitor showed sinus tachycardia caused by the severe blood loss he had already suffered.

Without any time to waste, the two paramedics carefully lifted Starsky onto the gurney and started to lift it into the back of the ambulance to rush him to the hospital.

"Give me that bag of Lactated Ringers," the dark haired paramedic yelled at his partner as he started a second IV. "He's bleeding out! We gotta move or we'll gonna lose him!"

The ominous words echoed in Hutch's ears as he watched the doors to the ambulance closing.

"Come on, son…" Dobey said. "I'll drive you to the hospital." He could feel the tall blond's body trembling beneath his touch as he guided Hutch over to his car and helped him inside. Several other officers rushed towards their own vehicles to accompany their fallen comrade to the hospital.

Hutch slumped down in the front seat of Dobey's car and buried his face in his hands, silent sobs racking his body as they raced towards the closest hospital with a trauma unit. Dobey threw worried glances at the man beside him. He recognized the early signs of shock, and he knew in his heart that he stood the risk of losing not just one good officer, but two. If Starsky didn't survive, then neither would Hutch. They were too close, their lives too intertwined with each other.

Every man and woman who pinned on the badge knew the risk they faced every day. Dobey had lost his own partner several years ago and had never completely gotten over the loss. He had the love of his wife and his family to help him deal with his grief and loss, but Hutch didn't really have anyone except his friends in the department to stand by him. He was estranged from his own family, who didn't approve of him deciding to become a cop instead of following in his father's footsteps. Starsky and Hutch had both had some close calls in the past but never anything like this. Dobey said a silent prayer that Starsky wouldn't die on the way to the hospital.

Although Dobey had never admitted it to the two detectives, Starsky and Hutch were his favorite team, and he cared about them as if they were part of his own family. He knew that the sight of Starsky lying on that pavement surrounded by a pool of his own blood would be branded on his brain for the rest of his life. Captain Dobey was a religious man, and he believed in miracles. He knew that Starsky's life was now in God's hands, and that God would be the one to decide if he lived or died.

Without a second thought, he reached over and laid a comforting hand on Hutch's thigh. "He's gonna be okay, Ken. Starsky won't give up without a fight," Dobey said, using Hutch's first name deliberately to focus his attention. "But he's gonna need you right there beside him fighting, too."

Any further words Dobey had planned to say were cut off as he pulled into the driveway at Memorial Hospital. Hutch was out of the car and running towards the emergency room entrance before Dobey had a chance to come to a complete stop. Slamming on his brakes, he threw open his door and hurried after the distraught blond, moving remarkably fast for a man of his bulk.

Inside the emergency room, he found Hutch at the receptionist's desk demanding to see Starsky.

"He's a cop! He was shot just a little while ago!" Hutch said in a loud voice, ignoring the fact that he was in a hospital. "He's my partner, and I want to see him! Now where the hell is he?"

The nurse on duty looked uncomfortable as she said, "Sir, if you will just have a seat over there….I'm sure someone will be out to talk to you soon."

Stepping up behind him. Dobey put a gentle hand on Hutch's shoulder and said quietly "Let's sit down, son. They'll tell us how he is as soon as they know anything."

"C..C..aptain…." Hutch said, the stutter that only appeared when he was upset or under stress making him stumble over his words, "I have to be in there with him. I can't let him d..d..ie alone…."

Hutch's words tore at the Captain's heart. He knew how Hutch felt, but he knew that the medical staff would never allow it. Their eyes met,and they each saw the pain and fear reflected there. Hutch's shoulders slumped in defeat as he meekly followed his Captain over to one of the hard plastic chairs in the waiting room and sat down at his side. Hutch didn't even notice several other people sitting in the waiting room blanching at the sight of his blood stained clothes. He leaned forward, his forearms resting on his thighs as he bowed his head, closed his eyes and prayed harder than he had ever prayed in his life.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

Within the next half hour, the waiting room was filled with fellow police officers who had joined the vigil. Minnie Kaplan, the resident computer whiz at headquarters, was keeping busy by making sure that everyone had coffee or soft drinks.

A nurse walked over to Hutch and smiled, holding out a neatly folded set of surgical scrubs. "I thought you might like to change your clothes. Some of the other visitors are getting upset because of the bloodstains. I can take them down to the laundry for you and have them washed."

Hutch looked up into the nurse's compassionate brown eyes and nodded his head absently. Accepting the clean clothes from her, he shoved himself to his feet and stumbled down the hallway to the men's room.

Pausing in front of one of the sinks, he turned on the water, adjusting it to a comfortable temperature. Holding his hands underneath the spray of water, he watched in a detached way as the water turned red, rinsing the traces Starsky's blood from his skin. Raising his head, he looked at his reflection in the mirror, barely recognizing the stranger's face that stared back at him.

The big blond's shoulders began to shake with silent sobs as he lowered his head and struggled to contain his fear and grief. The image of Starsky's body lying on the pavement beside the Torino played over and over in his mind like an endless loop of tape. He had never felt more alone or terrified in his life.

Finally pulling himself together, he took off his bloody shirt and jeans, changing into the scrubs. He stuffed his bloody clothing into a plastic laundry bag the nurse had given him. Turning back to the sink, he turned on the cold water and cupped his hands beneath the faucet. He splashed some cold water on his face to try and clear his head before returning to the waiting room.

When he returned to his seat, Minnie sat down in the chair beside him and handed him a fresh cup of coffee. "Here you go, Sugar," she said quietly. "I put in lots of sugar and cream….just the way you like it."

"Thanks, Minnie," Hutch told her with a feeble smile. He didn't bother to correct her. That was the way Starsky preferred his coffee and Hutch had just gotten in the habit of drinking it that way, since they shared the same cup most of the time, anyway. It was just one of the routines they had fallen into over the years, just like stealing food off each other's plate or borrowing each other's clothes.

As a sudden hush fell over the room, Hutch glanced up to see a doctor dressed in surgical scrubs walking down the hallway towards them. The tall blond held his breath as he waited for the doctor to speak.

"Family for David Starsky?" the doctor asked, as his eyes swept over the crowded waiting area. Hutch and Captain Dobey both immediately stepped forward. The doctor frowned slightly, realizing immediately that neither of these men resembled his patient enough to be related to him.

"I'm Captain Dobey of the Bay City Police Department. Sergeant Starsky is one of my men and this is his partner, Sergeant Hutchinson. How is he?"

"Why don't we go somewhere we can talk privately?" the doctor said, gesturing for them to follow him back down the hallway.

Hutch took a deep breath as he followed the doctor. He braced himself, knowing that the news was not going to be good. The doctor led the way to a small room that was used primarily to talk privately to friends and family members of critically injured patients. As the three men stepped inside, the doctor motioned for Dobey and Hutch to have a seat. They sat down on a black leather sofa and looked at the doctor expectantly.

Sighing softly, the doctor pinched the bridge of his nose as he took a seat in a black leather chair sitting adjacent to the sofa. Looking at the worried, anxious faces in front of him, he said, "My name is Dr. Riley. Sergeant Starsky is in surgery even as we speak. He's still alive, but his body has suffered massive damage. We've managed to stop the bleeding, but with the damage he's suffered…it's highly unlikely that he'll survive."

"But there's still a chance as long as he's still alive, isn't there?" Dobey asked as the doctor's words sank in.

"There's always a chance, and I don't want to take that hope away from you," Dr Riley said solemnly. "But the human body can only withstand so much damage. Any family members should be notified immediately, and you might want to think about making him a no code. If his heart stops again, it might be more humane to just let him go in peace."

"NO!" Hutch snapped sharply. "We have medical power of attorney for each other, and I won't allow you to do that!" Hutch looked at the doctor, his ice blue eyes warning the doctor not to push the issue.

"Can you tell us exactly what the injuries were?" Captain Dobey asked. He laid a hand on Hutch's shoulder to calm him until the doctor had a chance to tell them everything.

"Sergeant Starsky was hit four times in the torso by high caliber bullets. One bullet entered his left shoulder, causing massive tissue and muscle damage. As it exited through his back, it shattered his shoulder blade. A second bullet entered his chest just under his left nipple. This bullet shattered two ribs on impact and broke into fragments. The bullet fragments and shattered pieces of bone from the broken ribs caused severe damage to his left lung. That lung collapsed, filling with blood." The doctor watched their faces as he carefully explained the damages caused by the bullets. Once he was certain they were processing the information, he continued, "A third bullet entered his right side just below his waist and exited through his left side just below his ribcage. That bullet ruptured his spleen, causing massive internal bleeding. It also nicked his lower intestine and caused the contents of his bowel to seep into his abdominal cavity. The fourth bullet entered his lower back, close to his spinal column, and exited through his stomach, causing major damage to the stomach itself."

The doctor paused. This was the part of his job that he hated the most. Doctors were not miracle workers and there was only so much they could do, especially in cases as serious as this one. "All we can do now is wait and see how well his body responds to treatment. I think time is going to be the key factor here. We're doing all we can, but to be honest with you-I'm not sure it's going to be enough." Doctor Riley looked at the two men sadly. He could see the devastation in their faces at his news, and he hated being the one to put that expression in their eyes.

Hutch mutely allowed Captain Dobey to guide him back to the waiting room. He was stunned and in shock. Blackness fell over him as he thought about a life without Starsky. Without Starsky, he had no life, at least not one worth living. When they walked back into the waiting room, one look at Hutch's face was all it took for his fellow officers to know that the news was not good.

With murmurs of support and concern, the gathered officers began leave the room. When a fellow officer is hurt, it affects the entire brotherhood and when that officer is shot down in the Police Department parking garage by two men dressed as police officers that makes it even more personal. Every officer on the force from the lowest patrolman to the highest level officials would be working together to find the person responsible for the attack on Starsky.

Starsky and Hutch were both well-liked by most of their peers, and even the ones who didn't particularly like them still respected them. Their partnership was almost legendary in the department, and everybody knew how close the two men were, not just as partners, but as best friends. It was unusual to see Starsky without the tall blond by his side. At times, they seemed to share almost a psychic bond that could be unnerving to

those around them, but it was also one of the things that made their partnership so unique.

As the room cleared out, Captain Dobey turned his attention back to Hutch. Minnie was sitting on the sofa beside him with one arm around his shoulder, talking to him quietly. Hutch was simply sitting there, staring at the floor, lost in his own grief. His arms were resting against his knees with his hands so tightly clenched together that his knuckles were white. Dobey could feel Hutch's pain intensely. His own heart was torn in two by the tragedy.

Dobey had to maintain a certain distance from his men for professional reasons, but those boundaries had been crossed more than once with the team of Starsky and Hutch. He had spent more hours than he cared to remember over the past seven years sitting in one emergency room or the other, consoling one of them when the other one was injured, waiting for news on their condition. But it had never been this bad before.

Dobey had lost several good men over the years, and he hated the thought of losing Starsky. He closed his eyes for a moment and sighed deeply. There were phone calls that needed to be made, and he didn't think that Hutch was in any condition to be making them right now.

Walking over to the sofa, he glanced down at Hutch and Minnie. In a soft voice he said, "I'm going to call Starsky's family. Can I get either one of you anything?"

"No thanks, Captain," Minnie said, shaking her head as she gently rubbed her hand over Hutch's hunched shoulders. "We'll be just fine."

Hutch didn't respond, and Dobey couldn't help but wonder if he had even heard him. Dobey's shoulders slumped wearily as he slowly made his way to a row of payphones down a short hallway to his right. Mentally, he braced himself for the phone call that no police captain wants to make.

Dobey walked up to one of the payphones and dug a small notebook out of his pocket. It contained the next of kin contact numbers for each of the men under his command. He flipped through the pages until he found the phone number in New York for Rachel Starsky.

He dropped in some change to get the operator on the line. When a nasal voice said hello in his ear, he said, "I'd like to call Brooklyn New York. 555-6643."

"Please deposit $3.00 for three minutes."

Dobey deposited the correct amount of change and listened as the connection to New York was made. After four rings, a soft feminine voice said, "Hello?

'

"Mrs. Starsky?"

"Yes."

"This is Harold Dobey. I'm David's Captain here in Bay City."

"How badly is he hurt?" she asked in a carefully controlled voice. But as a trained observer, Dobey could hear the slight tremble behind her words

"You need to come as soon as you can."

"Is my son dead? You can tell me the truth, Captain. I'm not just a police officer's mother, I'm also a police officer's widow."

"No, ma'am. He's still alive, but it doesn't look good. He was shot 4 times by an unknown assailant in the parking lot at police headquarters. You should notify any other family members that need to know before they hear it on the news. I understand that he has an Aunt and Uncle that live here. I can notify them for you if you like."

"I would appreciate that, Captain."

"I can also call the airlines and make travel arrangements for you and your other son. I'll call you back with the information."

"Thank you. But, Nicky won't be coming with me. He isn't in town right now. To tell the truth, I'm not really sure exactly where he is."

"I understand. I'll make those other calls immediately and call you back in a little while with the information for your flight. I will also arrange to have an officer pick you up at the airport and bring you directly to the hospital."

"Thank you, Captain, for all your help. How is Ken doing?"

"He's hanging in there."

"Please let him know that I will be there as soon as I can."

"I'll make sure he knows," Dobey said. He hung up to disconnect his call, then he immediately picked up the phone again to make the rest of his calls.


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

A hush fell throughout the crowd of officers still gathered at the hospital when a doctor in blood-stained scrubs suddenly appeared. In a solemn voice, he said, "Family for David Starsky?"

"Here," Dobey said as Hutch bounced to his feet to stand beside him. "I'm his commanding officer, and this is his partner."

The doctor nodded to acknowledge them. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before saying quietly, "I'm sorry. Mr. Starsky died on the operating table. There was nothing we could do."

Before anyone could react, Hutch gave a guttural scream and began slamming his fists against the wall. Two officers and Dobey grabbed him to keep him from injuring himself. He moaned deeply, tears running down his cheeks, as the two officers lowered him into a nearby seat. Both his hands were bloody, the skin over his knuckles ripped open.

"I'm sorry," The doctor said as he stepped up to take a closer look at Hutch's hands. "You need to take him to an exam room. He going to need x-rays to make he didn't break anything, and probably a few stitches as well." Turning to face Dobey, he once again offered his condolences before walking away. Empty words that fell on deaf ears.

Dobey immediately turned his attention back to Hutch, who was moaning softly and staring vacantly. In the same quiet tone he would use with a wounded animal or hurt child, he said, "Come with me, Hutch. We need to have a doctor take a look at your hands."

As he helped Hutch to his feet, he caught Minnie's eyes. Without a word, she fell in step on the other side and the two of them led a seemingly docile Hutch through the swinging doors into the exam area of the hospital. A helpful nurse ushered them into an empty cubicle to the left and closed the curtain behind them to assure their privacy.

As he sat down on the edge of the exam table, Hutch seemed to rouse from his stupor. Looking at Dobey he whispered "Starsk?"

"He's gone. There was nothing the doctors could do. He died on the table."

"Nooooo…" Hutch whimpered, fresh tears spilling from his eyes. Minnie didn't even try to hide her own tears. Ken Hutchinson was one of the strongest men she knew, but even the strongest men in the world have a breaking point.

Even Dobey let a few tears fall for his fallen officer and friend. He would still have to break the news to his own family. To his young daughter, Rosie, Starsky and Hutch were her honorary Uncles, and he knew she would take the news hard. Other then her grandmother's death when she was only four, seven-year old Rosie had never lost someone really close to her before.

Minnie held Hutch close. He rested his head on her shoulder, silent sobs shaking his entire body. A doctor came in and immediately sent Hutch to have x-rays done on his hands. After that was done, it was determined that he had broken his right hand and severely bruised his left. It took 10 stitches to repair the torn skin over his knuckles, and he left with a soft cast on his right forearm.

"You're coming home with me for a few days," Dobey told him as they left the exam room. The tone of his voice left no room for argument. Hutch didn't answer; he just stared vacantly in front of him and let Dobey guide him out of the hospital. The doctor had given Hutch a prescription for valium along with one for pain. Dobey would monitor Hutch's use of both over the next few days.

News of the shooting had already spread throughout the city, and several reporters had gathered in front of the emergency entrance to the hospital.

Dobey pushed his way past them, his only remark a terse, "No Comment." The department's PR people would prepare a statement that would be released to the press.

Dobey escorted Hutch to his car and guided him into the front seat, helping him fold his long legs into the vehicle. He fastened Hutch's seat belt for him and closed the door. Hutch still was not responding other than that vacant stare into his own private hell.

Half an hour later, Dobey pulled into the drive of his modest two-story home on a quiet street in a suburb of Bay City. The front door opened as he helped Hutch from the car and his wife, Edith, appeared in the archway. She watched with a sad expression on her expressive face as her husband led a meek Hutch up the cobblestone walk to the house.

"Let me take him to the guest room," Edith told him, "So he can rest for awhile."

"Where are the kids?"

"Cal went over to his friend, Billy's. He knows. He heard a news report about the shooting. It's all over the news. Rosie is up in her room. She doesn't know yet."

"I'll tell her," Dobey said with a heavy sigh. He turned Hutch's care over to his capable wife and slowly climbed the stairs to the second floor to talk to his daughter.

Rosie Dobey glanced up as her father opened the door and entered her bedroom. A sensitive, yet precocious, child, she knew from the expression on her father's face that something was wrong.

"Daddy?" she said softly. "Why are you home so early?"

"Come here, princess," Dobey said as he sat down on her bed and held out his arms. Rosie ran to him and climbed into his lap, leaning her head against his broad chest as he wrapped her in his arms.

"What's the matter, Daddy?"

"Something's happened, baby. Something bad. Uncle Dave got shot."

"Is he okay?"

"No, Baby, he isn't. He died. He went to heaven to be with Jesus and Grandma."

"And he's not coming back?" she asked.

"No, he's not."

"What about Uncle Ken? Is he okay?"

"He's very sad right now. I brought him home with me and he's going to be staying with us for a few days." Dobey smiled and kissed the top of his daughter's head.

"Cause he loved Uncle Dave, too…"

"Yes, he did."

"Can I see Uncle Ken?"

"Maybe later. He's resting right now."

Rosie buried her face against his chest and began to cry softly. Dobey sat there, rocking her gently, until she cried herself to sleep. Laying her on the bed, he covered her with light blanket and headed back downstairs to the comforting arms of his wife.

Edith silently wrapped her arms around him and gave him a heartfelt hug.

"How's Ken?" Dobey asked

"Resting. Still in shock. We'll have to keep a close eye on him."

"I have some pills the doctor gave me for him, but I don't want to give them to him just yet."

"How are you doing?"

"As well as can be expected," Dobey said as he jerked his tie loose and threw it over the easy chair. His voice cracked. "I always knew this could happen…but, it happened right in the police parking lot…two men dressed up like cops…" He took a deep shuddering breath and exhaled slowly. "I need a drink."

Dobey was not normally a drinking man. An occasional beer now and then, but seldom anything stronger. But, under the present circumstances, he was going to break that rule. He walked over to their sparsely stocked bar and poured himself a shot of whiskey. He drank it down in one quick swallow, grimacing as it burned its way down his throat to his stomach. A second shot followed, and then he capped the bottle and returned it to the shelf.

"Did you reach his mother?" Edith asked

Dobey nodded solemnly. "Her plane should be landing around five-thirty. Starsky's Aunt and Uncle are meeting her at the airport and breaking the news to her."

"His brother isn't going to be with her?"

"No. She said she doesn't know where he is right now to tell him."

"He may hear it on the news. I heard a report just before you came down that news of the shooting had gone nationwide."

"God, help us all get through the next few days…" Dobey said quietly.

"And God help Ken," Edith said, "I'm not sure that he's going to be able to handle losing David."

"I know. We could lose them both."


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

"What do you mean?" Rachel demanded in a distraught voice. "How could something like that happen?"

"I'm truly sorry, Mrs. Starsky," The funeral director said, sounding truly apologetic. "The employee responsible for the error has been severely reprimanded. The service will still proceed as scheduled."

Without replying, Rachel hung the phone and began to cry. Alarmed, her sister-in-law, Rose, reached out for her. "What's wrong? What happened?"

"That was the funeral home. Someone made a mistake on some form, and David's been cremated."

"What? How could they do that?"

"He said the employee who made the mistake has been severely reprimanded, but the damage has already been done. The service with go on as scheduled, but it won't be the same…" Rachel said through her tears.

"Come have a cup of tea and rest for a little bit. We don't have to be at the church until two."

Three hours later, Rachel, her sister-in-law, and her brother-in-law arrived at the Mt. Helen Church in downtown Bay City. Since Starsky had been a decorated police officer with a distinguished career, Rachel had opted for a traditional police focused service with just a few Jewish traditions being followed by the family and a select few, including the Dobey family and Hutch. Rachel, Rosie and Edith Dobey were all tastefully dressed in demure black dresses, while Hutch and the Captain were dressed in full dress uniform, complete with their commendations and ribbons. They all wore a torn black ribbon around their upper arm.

The congregation was a mixed group of people, mutely attesting to the people whose lives had been touched by David Starsky. Police officers were out in force. Even officers who had never met him were there to show their support for a fallen officer. Street characters were scattered through the crowd, including Huggy Bear, Sweet Alice, Merle the Earl, and several other mutual friends of Starsky and Hutch.

Rachel had requested that, instead of flowers, donations be made in her son's name to the police officer's widows and children's fund. A simple wooden casket sat on the altar with a single banner reading "Beloved Son" in front of it.

Rachel and her family were shown to the front pew. Rachel had graciously insisted that the Dobey's and Hutch sit with her in the spot traditionally reserved for the immediate family members. Hutch was barely functioning. His eyes were red and swollen and his face a mask of agony. Rachel sat beside him and rested her hand on his leg. She knew how much he had loved her son, and she knew that her son had loved him. He was suffering just as much, if not more than she was, and she recognized that. Hutch managed to give her a small smile before he shut down again.

Both a Rabbi and the Police Chaplin would be conducting the service. The Chaplin spoke of Starsky's long career, his devotion to the job, and his concern for the public he served. The Rabbi spoke of the Starsky family's love for each other, their loyalty, and the bond between mother and son despite the distance that separated them. When the Rabbi finished, Captain Dobey slowly made his way to the podium to deliver his own eulogy.

"David Starsky was one of the best police officers I ever had the privilege of supervising. He may not have always played by the rules or followed the book, but he got the job done along with his partner, Kenneth Hutchinson. More than once during his career, he put his own life on the line to protect the public he had sworn to serve. He will be sorely missed. He was not only one of my best men, he was also a friend. My two children fondly called him 'Uncle Dave' and loved spending time with him. He could drive me crazy at times, especially with his colorful reports, but I always knew I could trust him. Rest in peace, son." Dobey's voice choked up at the end, and he had to grab his handkerchief from his pocket to dab at his eyes as he made his way back to his seat.

Hutch rose slowly to his feet. Under Dobey and Rachel's watchful eye, he made his way to the podium with heavy steps. He stood there in silence for several minutes, staring out at the crowd with sad eyes, unable to find his voice. When a tear fell down his cheek and he raised one hand to his face, Rachel rose to her feet and hurried to his side. She spoke to him softly and took his arm, gently leading him back to his seat.

Several people in the congregation were openly crying, moved to tears by the service itself, and by the sight of Hutch's unbearable grief. When the service was finished, Captain Dobey, Huggy Bear, Cal Dobey, Merle The Earl, Al Starsky, and another detective named Babbock stepped forward to carry the coffin to the hearse.

Even though Hutch was not an official pallbearer, he walked behind the coffin with his head bowed, followed by Rachel, Edith Dobey, and little Rosie Dobey. Hutch had argued and pleaded to be allowed to help carry the coffin, but Captain Dobey had wisely refused to allow it. He knew that Hutch would have collapsed under the weight of his grief if he had. He was functioning, but only marginally. His mind still refused to accept the inevitable.

Over fifty police cars and thirty private vehicles followed the hearse to The Golden Haven Cemetery. It was the same cemetery where Starsky's fiancé, Terry, was buried. He had never stopped loving her. Every Sunday, he had placed a single red rose on her grave. Knowing how he had felt about her, Rachel had managed to find a plot for her son two spaces down from hers.

The crowd gathered around the open grave where the Rabbi gave a short sermon and then led Rachel, Rose, Al, and Hutch in saying the Kaddish, the Jewish prayer for the dead. Rachel had been surprised to find out that Hutch knew the words to the ancient prayer. He told her that Starsky had taught him the words years ago.

There weren't many dry eyes in the crowd as the simple wooden coffin was lowered into the ground. Per Jewish tradition, each mourner stepped forward before leaving to throw a handful of dirt into the grave. Hutch refused to leave until everyone else was gone. Dobey and Huggy Bear patiently waited with him, while Edith and his children accompanied Rachel back to Al and Rosie's house for the consolation meal.

Finally, Dobey cleared his throat and said, "It's time to go, son."

Hutch turned to look at Dobey with a sadness that tore at the big man's heart. "I can't leave him, Cap. Starsky hates being alone in the dark, and he doesn't like to be in enclosed places…"

"It's okay, man…" Huggy said gruffly. "Starsky's in a better place now. Remember? He's not in the dark or alone. He's with his Pop and Terry…and the big man himself."

"Starsky?" Hutch whispered, looking around as if he expected his partner to suddenly appear at his side. He didn't object as Dobey took one arm and Huggy took the other, leading him across the meticulously cared-for grass to Huggy's car.

Al and Rose Starsky lived in a quiet, lower-middle-class neighborhood in a slightly run-down area of Bay City. It was the same house where a sullen, thirteen-year-old Starsky had come to live when Rachel sent him to California after his father's tragic murder. The tiny, one-story house was well-kept and the grass freshly mowed. The paint was faded and starting to chip, but the house had a warm, lived-in look that was immediately inviting.

A pan of water sat on a stand just inside the front door. Rachel had already explained the Jewish tradition of washing their hands before entering the house. It was a symbolic cleaning of one's self after being in close proximity with the deceased. Inside the house, all the mirrors had been covered with a black cloth, again, part of the mourning ritual.

In the dining room, the traditional Jewish condolence meal had been prepared. There were baskets of bread and rolls, bowls of cooked vegetables, and plates of hard boiled eggs. Pots of coffee and tea completed the meal. Guests who weren't Jewish were shown to a different table where there were plates of cake and pie laid out.

Dobey had to return to work the next day, but he had put Hutch on an indefinite bereavement leave of absence. He knew that Hutch planned on sitting Shiva with the Starsky family for the next seven days, then he intended on returning to his own apartment. But, Dobey and Huggy had agreed to keep a close eye on him. All of his friends were concerned about Hutch's state of mind,


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

Hutch looked around the empty rooms with a heavy sigh. It had been two weeks since Starsky's brutal murder, and he was still on shaky ground. Nightmares kept him from sleeping, and during the day, he kept thinking he would look up and see Starsky standing there. Sometimes he even thought he heard that beloved voice calling his name, begging for help that he could no longer give. He had totally isolated himself from his friends and was still on leave from the department.

That morning Huggy Bear had accompanied him to Starsky's apartment where they supervised as his furniture was turned over to a local auction house and the rest of his belongings were packed to be mailed to Rachel in New York. Rachel had insisted that Hutch keep anything he wanted from Starsky's personal belongings. He took all the pictures of the two of them together, some of the record albums they had both enjoyed, the bulky, white sweater with the black designs and belt, and the wicker, fan-backed chair that Starsky had loved, even if it was out of style. Unknown to anyone else, he had also taken the leather jacket Starsky had been wearing when he was shot out of the evidence room.

Now nothing remained in the empty rooms except memories and ghosts of better times. Huggy looked at his friend and said, "What are you gonna do with his car?"

"Earl has it," Hutch said. "I don't care what he does with it. It's all shot up, anyway." A thin smile tugged at his mouth. "The damn thing kept me from getting shot, but it sure as hell didn't protect Starsky."

"What about you, man? What are you gonna do?"

"Hell if I know," Hutch growled in an annoyed voice. He knew that everyone was worried about him, but he was tired of them asking what he planned on doing without Starsky by his side. All he knew was it felt as if half his heart had been torn away, and the other half was slowly bleeding out. He just wanted to die so he could be with his partner and best friend again. "I need to get out of here."

"Come by The Pits later and hang out. You ain't been there since…" Huggy hesitated, catching himself before he finished his sentence. He knew that Hutch would probably ignore the offer, but he had to extend the invitation.

"Since Starsky died, right?" Hutch said bitterly. "That's right…died. Starsky's dead, and he isn't ever coming back." He climbed into his latest old beater and drove away with a shrill squeal of the tires.

Huggy sighed heavily. He didn't know how to reach out to his old friend, how to help through this ordeal. He was still grieving himself. He and Starsky went way back to Starsky's first few weeks in Bay City. But, even as close as he was to Starsky, he never shared the unique bond that Starsky and Hutch had.

Instead of heading back to The Pits as he had intended, Huggy drove to the garage owned by Merle the Earl where he made a deal to restore the Torino to it's former glory at his expense. It's wasn't much, but it was the least he could do to remember and honor his old friend. Hutch didn't need to know, at least not until he was in a better frame of mind.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

After driving around for awhile to calm his jangled nerves, Hutch had returned to his apartment. He grabbed a six pack out of the refrigerator and slumped down on the sofa. He planned to spend the evening the same way he had been spending all of his evenings since Starsky left him: drinking until he passed out. It was the only way he could sleep, and even then the nightmares usually woke him up before morning.

He woke shortly before dawn to the sound of his own screams. Trying to control his shaking, he shoved himself to his feet and raced for the bathroom. He barely made it before losing the meager contents of his stomach into the toilet bowl. He continued retching painfully for several minutes before his stomach finally decided it was empty. His face was covered with sweat, and he was breathing heavily as he slumped on the floor with his back against the bathtub.

Not for the first time since Starsky's murder, he thought about how easy it would be to just eat a bullet. The only problem was Dobey had taken away his gun to keep him from doing just that. Hutch knew if he wanted one badly enough, it wouldn't be hard to find a cheap gun for sale on the streets. Sometimes that thought was the only thing that got him out of bed in the mornings. He wondered how much longer he could go on like this before he did go looking for an end to his own misery.

Hutch dragged himself to his feet and climbed into the shower without bothering to undress. He turned on the water, adjusting the temperature until it was as hot as he could stand. He stood under the spray until his skin was red and stinging. Turning off the water, he stepped out of the tub and stripped off his wet clothes. He left them lying on the bathroom floor as he went into his bedroom and rummaged through his closet for the last of his clean clothes.

Once he was dressed, he left his apartment and drove to his bank. Once there, he withdrew all the money from his account and then got back into his car. He began to drive and he kept driving with no particular destination in mind. He just knew that he had to get away from the city and his memories. Maybe then he wouldn't see Starsky's ghost wherever he looked.

Hutch drove for over ten hours before he finally pulled over in a small one-horse town somewhere in New Mexico. Briefly he thought about calling either Dobey or Huggy to let them know where he was, but he decided against it. He needed to get used to being alone.

He rented a room at a Motel Six across the street from a bar and grill and settled in for the night. But, first he needed some chemical refreshment to calm his racing thoughts. Pocketing the key to his room, he crossed the street to the bar.

The interior was like any other hole-in-the-wall bar across the country. Chipped tables with mismatched chairs, worn tiles on the floor, an old jukebox blaring in one corner, a pool table near the back, and a couple of pin ball machines. Most of the customers seemed to be either hard core drinkers or worn out whores looking for an easy mark.

Hutch sat down at the bar and ordered a shot of whiskey with a beer chaser. Within minutes he was joined by a bleached blonde with hard lines around her mouth and sagging breasts.

"Hey there, handsome," she said with a smile that showed teeth badly in need of a dentist. "I ain't never seen you around here before."

"Maybe that's because I've never been around here before," Hutch said.

"Would you like some company for a couple of hours? I can make it worth your while."

"No, thanks. I'm not in the mood," Hutch said with a thin smile. Even on his best days it had never been his habit to frequent prostitutes. He had never needed to. With his looks, the women threw themselves at him. Even though he couldn't remember the last time he'd had sex, the old whore was wasting her time.

"I bet I could make you change your mind," the blonde said as she reached down and made a grab for his crotch.

Hutch grabbed her wrist, holding it just tight enough to hurt a little.

"I said not tonight," he said in a calm voice with just a touch of menace, enough to got his point across. The blonde muttered a few choice words under her breath and stomped back to her seat in the back of the room.

Hutch ordered another drink and then bought a six pack to take back to his room with him. It was hot and stuffy in his room even with the air conditioner turned on. He stripped off his clothes and lay there in the nude, letting the alcohol lull him to sleep.

The nightmare that woke him that night was once of the worst ones yet. He could hear Starsky's dying voice begging him to help him, to save him. Then the same voice was accusing him of letting him die. Of not protecting him and watching his back like he was supposed to do. Telling him what Hutch had been telling himself since the murder. That it was Hutch's fault that Starsky was dead. He sat there staring out the window, drinking and watching the sun rise.

Around eight A.M. he decided to get dressed and go across the street for some breakfast. At that time of day, the bar was empty except for a pretty brunette in her middle twenties who was tending the bar.

"Mornin," she said in a cheerful voice as she set a cup of coffee on the bar in front of Hutch as soon as he sat down. "Coffee's on the house in the mornings. So's the conversation." She grinned "You want anything to eat?"

"Just some wheat toast, lightly buttered." Hutch returned her smile with a genuine smile of his own. It had been so long since he had smiled that he had almost forgotten how.

"Coming right up, she said, disappearing through a swinging door into the kitchen.

Hutch closed his eyes momentarily. He could feel the start of a nagging headache behind his eyes that he knew from experience could easily turn into a migraine. After he ate his meager breakfast, he needed to return to his room and draw the drapes, then try to sleep until it went away.

The girl returned within minutes with his order. As she set it down on the bar, she said, "My name's Angie. You staying at the Motel Six?"

"Yeah. I'll probably be pulling out tonight or tomorrow."

"Figured as much. Nobody stays in this town if they can help it. But, its guys like you just passing through that make this job worthwhile. You all have a story to tell, some more than others."

"Sorry to disappoint you," Hutch told her "No story here."

"Hey, no problem. I'm just making conversation. Tell you what, breakfast's on me."

"You don't have to do that. I apologize for acting that way. I just don't feel like talking."

"That's okay, handsome. Breakfast is still on me. Enjoy. Maybe I'll see you again someday."

She moved to the other end of the bar to wash some glasses while Hutch finished his breakfast. He slipped a five dollar bill under his coffee cup as he left. He returned to his room where he finished the rest of his beer from the night before and managed to sleep for a couple of hours. When he woke up, late that afternoon, he checked out of his room and continued on his way.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

Captain Dobey shifted through the pile of papers on his desk, glancing at various papers as he sorted. When the phone rang, he grabbed it with one hand while he continued sorting with his other hand.

"Dobey."

"Captain, it's Huggy Bear. I'm at Hutch's place, and there's no sign of him. From the look of things, he hasn't been here for a day or so."

"Damn. Any idea where he might be?"

"Nada. Looks like all his clothes are still here, so I wouldn't think he went too far. I can check out some of his favorite haunts and get back to you."

"You do that, and I'll see what I can find out from this end," Dobey said. He hung up without a goodbye and sat there deep in thought for several minutes. A nagging concern clutched at his heart. Had Hutch finally gone over the edge and done something stupid? Or had he taken off, left the city for parts unknown? Either scenario was possible considering his present state of mind.

A quick phone call to Hutch's bank made it more likely that Hutch had left town since he had closed out his accounts. Now, all Dobey had to figure out was where the big blond had gone. Knowing the strained relations with his parents, Dobey doubted if he would have gone back to Duluth. But, he had to check it out.

After consulting his personnel file for his men, he found the phone number for Hutch's parents and quickly dialed the number. After several rings, a cultured feminine voice said in his ear, "Hutchinson Residence. How may I help you?"

"This is Captain Harold Dobey of the Bay City, California, Police Department. May I speak to Mr. or Mrs. Hutchinson, please?"

"This is Virginia Hutchinson. How may I help you, Captain Dobey?"

"I trying to locate Ken. Have you or your husband heard from him recently?"

" _Kenneth_ ," she put a strong emphasis on Hutch's full legal name, "does not call me or his father very often. I myself have not heard from my son in over a year. What makes you think he had?"

"I'm just checking out all the possibilities." Dobey said politely. "Perhaps you'd like to check with your husband and see if he has heard from Kenneth."

"I assure you, Captain…if my son has not contacted me, than he certainly has not contacted his father. I'm sure you are well aware of the fact that we do not have a cordial relationship with our son…not since he chose to disobey us and move to California. I'm also sure that you realize we strongly disapprove of his career choice. He was groomed for much better things."

"If you do hear from him would you please ask him to contact me as soon as possible?" Dobey said, trying to ignore the woman's cold indifference and subtle sarcasm.

"That will not be necessary," Virginia Hutchinson said firmly. "I guarantee you that we are the last people that Kenneth would contact."

There was a sharp click as she hung up the phone, disconnecting the call. Dobey sighed heavily as he hung up on his end of the line. He knew that Hutch had been estranged from his family for quite some time, but after speaking to his mother, Dobey felt nothing but pity for the way Hutch must have been raised

According to the records, Hutch also had a sister. Dobey wondered if his relationship with her was any better than the one with his parents. He dialed another number in Duluth and waited patiently for someone to answer.

Within minutes, a warm, female voice said, "Hello?'

"Is this Patricia Delaney?"

"Yes, it is. Who's calling, please?"

"This is Captain Harold Dobey of the Bay City Police Department in Bay City, California…"

"Kenny!" the voice cut in anxiously. "Is Kenny okay?"

"I'm trying to find him," Dobey said, smiling at the warmth and obvious concern in the woman's voice. "Have you heard from him?"

"Not for a couple of months. He called in March to wish me a happy birthday. But, I haven't talked to him since then."

"So you have a good relationship with him?"

"Yes…we're very close. I heard about what happened to David and I called Kenny immediately, but he never returned my calls. I was planning a trip to the city to see how he was doing. I know how close he was to David."

"That's why I'm calling. I believe he's left the city, and I am trying to get a lead on where he might have gone."

"I'm not sure how I can help you. Have you talked to our parents?"

"Yes."

"Then I'm sure you must realize that he would never come back here. The only other place I can think of where he might possibly go if he wanted to hide for awhile would be our grandfather's old farm in West Virginia. It's been deserted for years, but the property still belongs to us. Kenny and I used to spend each summer there when we were younger. It's one of the few places that has any happy memories for either one of us."

"Can you give me directions on how to get there and any other information you might have for the location?'

"Of course. I'll have to look up the information and get back to you. It's been almost twenty years since I've been there myself. Father used to rent it out until he decided it was too much trouble. It's been empty for the past five years. The only reason Father hasn't sold it before now is because our grandfather left it to me and Kenny."

"You've been very helpful, Mrs. Delaney. Please get that information to as soon as possible, and if you hear from Kenny, please let me know immediately."

"Certainly, and I would appreciate if you would do the same for me, if you find him. Kenny is usually very level-headed, but right now, he's hurting, and he isn't thinking straight.'

"I agree, and I will be in touch if I hear anything"

Dobey hung up from talking to Hutch's sister and then called Huggy Bear. The barkeep answered almost immediately. Dobey could hear the sound of muffled voices and a jukebox in the background.

"You got the Bear."

"Huggy? It's Captain Dobey."

"Hey, Cap. I was just getting ready to drop a dime on you. Word on the street is that Hutchie cleaned out his bank accounts and left town for awhile. Nobody seems to know where to or for how long."

It never failed to amaze Dobey how quickly could find out information from his numerous street contacts. That was one of the things that had made him Starsky and Hutch's primary snitch. A snitch who was also a close friend to both of them.

"I talked to his parents and his sister," Dobey said. "His parents didn't seem to care one way or the other, but his sister said he might have gone to a farm that their grandfather owned when they were kids. It's in West Virginia, and it was left to Hutch and his sister by their grandfather when he died."

"So what now?"

"I'm not sure. I'm waiting for his sister to send me the information on how to get to the farm, and once I have that, I'll decide what our next step should be. I don't want Hutch to feel like we're not giving him any space to work things out on his own, if that's what he needs."

"Well, if you need someone to take a road trip at the city's expense, I know someone who would be more than happy to do it."

"I'll keep that in mind," Dobey said with a thin smile. He hung up and tried to focus on the paperwork on his desk.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

Hutch turned onto the familiar, old, rural road. Even though it had been twenty-odd years since he had traveled this road, he was still greeted by the sight of familiar landmarks remembered from childhood. As he drove, he let his mind take him back to the happy memories associated with this area.

Every summer from time he was five years old until he was almost fourteen, Hutch and his younger sister had spent summers with their maternal grandfather on his farm. It was there that Hutch had learned to ride a horse and to love camping. The quiet solitude of this part of the country had been a balm to his young soul. Those summers had helped shape him into the man he had become and had helped him endure the rest of the time spent under his parents' roof.

Hutch had been devastated by his grandfather's death. It felt as if his heart had been ripped out, and with no way to fill that gaping hole, he had fallen into a months-long depression. Meeting Starsky had filled the void that had been left in his life and given him back the same love that he had shared with his grandfather.

He turned off the road into the gravel drive that led up to the old farm house. Nothing had changed over the years. The house and barn still looked the same. As he stepped out of the car and walked toward the house, Hutch could almost feel his grandfather's welcoming embrace.

He remembered the loud fights he had had with his father over the farm. The land was worth a lot of money, and his father wanted to sell it, but the property had been left to his children, not to his wife. Hutch and Patricia had formed a united front, and they refused to give up the land.

Hutch and his sister both had trust funds that their parents had set up for them when they were babies. They both refused to touch the money except for a specified amount they each set aside every month to be used specifically for the upkeep of the farm. After their father stopped renting out the property, that included paying a year-round caretaker.

Hutch stepped up onto the broad, wrap-around porch and reached down to retrieve the key from under a loose board by the front door. Unlocking the door, he stepped inside. On the drive here, he had stopped to call Ben, the caretaker, a neighbor who lived five miles down the road, to let him know he was going to be staying at the farm for awhile.

Inside the house, Hutch found a fully stocked refrigerator and pantry. The utilities had been turned on, and Ben had also had the phone turned on. Every time a new tenant moved in, the phone company issued the residence a new phone number. A scrap of paper on the table beside the phone had that number written on it and a short message from Ben, welcoming him back to the farm. Hutch smiled, feeling more comfortable and at home than he had for weeks.

Briefly, he thought about calling Dobey or Huggy to let them know where he was, but quickly changed his mind. He needed this time away from the city, away from his memories and his life there. Soon he would have to make some life-altering decisions and face the inevitable. But now he was still wrapped in his own loss and grief and an unrelenting, unbearable pain that wore away at him a little more every day.

Hutch walked into the living room, pausing in front of the huge stone fireplace that dominated the room. He remembered evenings spent in front of that fireplace roasting marshmallows or popping corn. Sometimes, Hutch had sat there and just watched the flame for hours, often until the early hours of the morning when his grandfather came downstairs and reminded him to go to bed.

His grandfather had also instilled in him a life-long love of music, teaching him those first simple chords on a guitar. The music had been another point of contention between him and his father, who saw music and playing guitar as a frivolous waste of time. The music had been one of Hutch's earliest forms of rebellion against his father's stringent rules.

Hutch treasured those happy, loving childhood memories. And he still carried the old pocket watch that his grandfather had left him. It still worked and Starsky, who had a fascination for watches himself, had often teased him about using the old-fashioned pocket watch instead of a wrist watch.

Those were happy times, and he had always hated returning to Duluth when summer ended, and it was time to return to school and their normal life. More than once he had begged his grandfather to let him stay there with him. As a boy, he had never understood why the old man always told him that he had to go home. As an adult, he understood that his father would never have allowed him to stay with his grandfather, and that his grandfather treasured their visits as much as they did and didn't want to do anything to endanger them.

As he wandered through the rooms, he noticed the changes to the interior. The flowered wallpaper that had decorated the three upstairs bedrooms had been replaced. Two of the rooms were painted in soft pastels, one blue and one pink, while the third room was painted a neutral shade of beige.

Downstairs, a second, smaller bathroom had been added, the living room had been paneled, and the kitchen had been enlarged. The kitchen appliances were new, and there was a television in the living room, a luxury his grandfather had never owned. Hutch knew that his father had paid for the additions just to attract the renters that had lived in the house over the years. Personally, Hutch preferred the house as it had been when he was a child.

He found himself back in the kitchen. Realizing that he was actually hungry, he opened the refrigerator and took out the ingredients for a nutritious salad and a ham sandwich. He finished off his meal with a glass of cold ice tea. He ate his meal sitting on the back porch watching the sunset.

"I wish I could have brought you here, Starsk," he said quietly, raising his eyes towards the sky as he spoke. "You would have loved it here, even if you were a city boy. I always meant to show you this place, but we just ran out of time before I could." His voice cracked, and a single tear ran down his cheek. He swallowed hard past the lump that still rose in his throat when he thought about Starsky.

Finished with his meal, he went back into the house and settled on the comfortable sofa in the living room. He turned on the television to the local station, which was showing the news. He was startled when a piece came on about the shooting in Bay City and the latest developments in the case. Evidence had shown that a man named James Gunther, one of the most powerful men in the country, had ordered the hit on Starsky and Hutch.

James Gunther, a man who had turned down a chance at the presidency because it would be a step down in power. A man whose name had been coming up consistently in a drug trafficking case that Starsky and Hutch had been investigating. He certainly had the money and the clout to arrange an assassination.

Hutch shut off the television and leaned his head back against the sofa, closing his eyes. He should be back in the city working on the case. He should be the one going after Gunther. But, he knew that he was in no condition to handle a case of this magnitude. Not now. Not when he still could barely get out of bed in the mornings. Better to let it be handled by someone else who could make sure that justice was served for Starsky.

"Oh, Starsk," Hutch whispered in a broken voice. "Why couldn't they have killed me, too? All I want is to be with you…I don't want to be here like this…I miss you so much…"

He broke down in tears and buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking. He curled up on the sofa, tucking his long legs up on the cushions, and eventually cried himself to sleep,

 _Hutch opened his eyes to find himself surrounded by a heavy mist. He had no idea where he was, but he didn't feel afraid or in danger. Through the mist, he saw a dark shadow approaching, a shadow that slowly took shape. Starsky._

" _Starsky!" Hutch cried out joyously. "You're here!" He looked around and chuckled. "Wherever here is."_

" _I'm only here because you're hurting so bad, buddy. I can't stand to see you like this. I'm dead, and I ain't coming back. You got to get yourself together. Stop trying to drag yourself into the grave with me."_

" _Noooo…I want to be with you. I should be with you! I let you down. You're dead because of me! I didn't watch your back the way I promised."_

" _It's not your fault, there's nothing you could have done. I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was my time to go…there's nothing anybody could do about that…not even you."_

" _I need you…I don't know how to live without you…"_

" _You'll find a way. You have to. It's not your time to go yet. And I don't want you doing anything stupid just because I'm not there, Blondie."_

" _I can't promise that…"_

" _You have to…and I have to go back…" Starsky's figure slowly turned and began to fade back into the mist._

" _Starsky! Nooooo…come back! Please come back…"_

Hutch woke to the sound of his own screams. He scrambled off the couch and stood there shaking, his heart pounding in his chest as he tried to catch his breath. The dream had been so real. He could till smell Starsky's unique scent and feel the warmth of his presence.

Maybe he was finally losing his mind.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8**

Captain Dobey shifted through the paperwork on his desk with a sigh. Most of his days seemed to be taken up by either paperwork or meetings, the bane of being the one in charge. Any other free time he might have during the day was spent putting out small brush fires within his own department.

The ringing of his telephone was a welcome distraction. Grabbing the receiver he barked "Dobey!"

"Captain Dobey," a vaguely familiar feminine voice said in his ear. "This is Rachel Starsky."

"Oh, Mrs. Starsky." Dobey's voice automatically softened when he learned the identify of his caller. "What can I do for you?"

"I received a rather disturbing letter in the mail today. I don't know who it was from because it wasn't signed. But, it claimed that David was still alive and here in New York."

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Starsky. I'm sure it is probably just someone's idea of a cruel joke. Unfortunately, things like this often happen in high profile cases like this one."

"You don't understand, Captain. David's rings were in the envelope with the letter. I know they were his, they belonged to his father, and he never took them off. And I never got them back from either the hospital or the funeral home. I just assumed they'd been lost somewhere in all the confusion."

Dobey knew the rings she meant. He had seen them on Starsky's hand often enough. A simple gold band and a silver band with a more intricate design. He always wore them on the little finger of his left hand.

"You're positive those are David's rings?" Dobey didn't doubt her identification of the rings, but he still had to ask.

"Of course I'm positive. I told you they belonged to his father. The gold ring was his father's wedding band, and it is inscribed. The silver band belonged to my mother who died in the camps during the war."

"I'm sorry. Please understand, I had to ask."

"There's no need to apologize. I just want to find out if there could be any truth to it. Could my son still be alive?"

"I don't see how. It would take a great deal of time and money to pull something like that off, not to mention the number of people that would have to be involved. Still, the existence of the rings raises several unanswered questions."

"How is Hutch doing? He needs to know about this right away. I'm sure he'll want to be part of finding out if it's true or not."

"I agree…but, at the moment, I don't know where Hutch is to tell him. He's been gone for almost two weeks now."

"Well, then you have to find him before he finds out about this somehow on his own."

"I do have a lead on where he might have gone, and I will arrange to have that checked out immediately. In the meantime, can you send me that letter and the envelope it came in? I'd like to have our lab here take a look at it to see if we can pull any evidence from it."

"Of course. I'll send those to you immediately. I'll send it express mail so you should get it in a day or two."

"That'll be fine, and I will keep you informed if we find out anything useful."

"I'd appreciate that."

Mrs. Starsky hung up, and Dobey did the same. He sat there for several minutes deep in thought. A part of him felt a surge of hope that, despite all the odds and the evidence to the contrary, David Starsky could possibly still be alive. But, if he was, it raised more questions. Who was behind making it look like he was dead and why? And, if he was alive, what was he doing in New York?

He opened his desk drawer and took out the envelope that he had received in the morning mail. The instructions on how to find Hutch's grandfather's farm in West Virginia. He picked up his phone and placed a call to Huggy Bear.

"You got the Bear, at your service," Huggy answered in his usual colorful way. "Tell me your pleasure, and the Bear will deliver."

"Huggy, it's Captain Dobey."

"Oh, hey, Cap. What can I do for you?"

"I just got a call from Mrs. Starsky. She got a letter in the mail this morning that claims Starsky is still alive and in New York."

"What? You don't really believe that do you?"

"Starsky's rings were in the envelope."

"What? That's impossible. We buried him…I helped carry his body to the hearse,"

"Huggy, nobody else knew this at the time, but the funeral home called Mrs. Starsky that morning and told her that someone at the funeral home made a mistake and Starsky's body had been accidentally cremated."

"Damn! You mean he really could be alive?"

"It's unlikely, but at this point, I'm willing to believe that anything could be possible. We need to find Hutch and tell him before he finds out some other way."

"Oh, yeah…my man Hutch is going to want to be a part of getting to the bottom of this…especially if there's any chance in hell that Starsky could still be alive."

"I just got the directions to his grandfather's farm in the mail this morning. Are you still up for a road trip?"

"Are you kidding? This is one trip I wouldn't miss. And I know the perfect traveling companion."

"Who's that?"

"Hutchie's favorite southern belle, Sweet Alice. She's from that part of the country, so she'll fit right in."

"Do you think she'll go with you?"

"She'd do anything for Handsome Hutch. That's what she calls him," Huggy said with a chuckle.

"Good. You work things out with her, and I'll make the travel arrangements from this end so the department picks up the tab for this little trip. Plan on leaving by the end of the week."

"You got it, Cap."

"Well, let's just hope that's where Hutch is," Dobey said gruffly, "because it's the only lead we have on his possible location."

Dobey hung up and returned to the paperwork demanding his attention. He prayed this was a solid lead, because he knew if it turned out to be just a vicious prank, it would be last straw as far as Hutch was concerned. He'd never be able to survive the disappointment or the pain of losing Starsky all over again. None of them would.

\\\\\\\


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9**

Alice, better known on the streets as "Sweet Alice" because of her sweet, southern charm, happily agreed to join Huggy Bear on the road trip to find Hutch. The Hutchinson farm was ten miles outside of Oak Hill, West Virginia, so the Captain had arranged for them to take a flight to Charleston. There they would rent a car and make the 200-odd-mile drive to the farm.

As they boarded the plane for the first leg of their journey, Sweet Alice said, "You know what Oak Hill is famous for, don't you?"

"No." Huggy shook his head.

"Why, Sugar, that's the town where Hank Williams died back in 1953. You do know who Hank Williams is, don't you?"

"Yeah, some hillbilly singer."

" _Some_ hillbilly singer?" Alice said in a shocked tone. "Shame on you! He was considered the greatest country singer and songwriter who ever lived. Why people still record his songs today! And he has a son, a grandson, a daughter, and a granddaughter who are all out there carrying on the family name."

"Sorry, Alice…" Huggy smirked. "That's not my kind of music. But, I'm sure Hutch knows who he is."

"Of course he does. He even sings some of his songs once in a while. I heard him do 'Cold Cold Heart"at a policeman's Bar-B-Q he invited me to one time."

"Okay, mama," Huggy said with a laugh as he held his hands up in surrender. "I believe you."

"Well, everybody should know who Hank Williams is. He's a legend." Sweet Alice smiled and settled back in her seat as the plane lifted into the air.

"Where are you from?" Huggy asked just to make conversation. Although, he knew that she was from one of the southern states, he didn't know which one.

"Sandy Hook, Kentucky."

"Anyone famous from there?"

"No, but it's not far from Paintsville, Kenucky. Loretta Lynn was born and raised in Van Lear, and that's just outside of Paintsville."

"I've heard of her. A waitress who used to work for me was a big fan of hers and was always going around singing her songs."

"Sounds like I need to educate you on the history of Country music." Alice laughed at her own words. She wasn't sure if Huggy was as ignorant of the topic as he appeared to be, or if he was just putting her on. She sighed softly as she let her thoughts drift back to her childhood, "I used to dream about going to Nashville myself someday…but, then mama died and daddy took off…so I had to take care of my little brother and sister. Then when the county took them away because they said I wasn't old enough, I ran away so they couldn't put me in a home too."

"Is that how you ended in Bay City?"

"Yeah…I was going to see Hollywood, maybe get discovered, and be a big star." She laughed a bitter laugh at her naivety at sixteen. "But, I had to eat, and you know how the rest of the story goes."

"Yeah," Huggy said. "It's the same story for way too many young girls who come to the big city with even bigger dreams."

"Hey, I'm not ashamed of what I do. I guess I could wait tables or tend bar some place, but I do okay. I have a bunch of regular clients now, so I don't have to free-lance anymore, and the only time I see somebody new is when one of my regular clients can vouch for them."

"You're one of the lucky ones," Huggy said. He thought about his own mother who had spent her life working the streets, dead at thirty-eight, the victim of a man who targeted working girls.

Their conversation faded as they both turned their attention to the in-flight movie, some family comedy with kids and a dog. It was late afternoon when the plane landed in Charleston. After retrieving their overnight bags, Huggy went to the rent-a-car counter to pick up the keys to the car that had been reserved for them.

Leaving the terminal, they found the light-blue Sedan in a reserved portion of the parking lot and climbed inside. Almost three hours later, they pulled into Oak Hill, West Virginia. From there, Alice read aloud the directions to the Hutchinson farm while Huggy navigated the narrow rural road.

It was another twenty minutes before he turned into the gravel drive that led to the farmhouse. Huggy grinned when he saw Hutch's old beater parked beside the barn. They had come to the right place. They had found Hutch.

Huggy climbed out of the car and, like the gentleman he was, opened the door for Alice, and held out his hand to help her from the vehicle. Together, they walked to the farmhouse. Huggy rapped sharply on the front door. He waited for several minutes, but nobody came to the door. He knocked again, a bit louder this time.

"Go the fuck away!" Hutch's raspy voice yelled from behind the closed door.

Exchanging glances, Alice took the lead and called out, "Hutch, honey…It's Alice and Huggy. We have some news for you…about Starsky."

The door flew open and Hutch stood there, eyeing them with a wild look in his eyes that concerned and frightened them both.

"What news? What about Starsky?" he demanded. His voice was hoarse from too much drinking and too little sleep.

"Can we come in?" Huggy asked quietly.

Remembering his manners, Hutch stepped aside and gestured for them to enter the house. As they did, he shut the door securely, turned to face them, and demanded again, "What about Starsky?"

"Mrs. Starsky received a letter Monday that claimed he's still alive and in New York," Huggy told him. "It wasn't signed, but it had a New York postmark. It also contained Starsky's rings."

"Starsky's rings? How the hell could someone get Starsky's rings?" Hutch growled as he became more agitated.

"We don't know yet. Dobey had Mrs. Starsky send him the letter and the envelope so your lab guys could take a look at it. But, they weren't much help. The letter and Mrs. Starsky's address had both been typed, and there were no fingerprints on the letter or the envelope other than hers."

"Captain Dobey sent us to find you and tell you before you heard about it somehow," Alice added.

"My sister gave him this address, didn't she?"

"Yeah, she did," Huggy told him. "She's worried about you, too, and wants you to call so she knows that your okay."

Hutch nodded with a dismissive wave of his hand. "I'll call her later."

"When's the last time you ate, darling?" Alice asked in her soft, gentle voice. "You've lost weight."

"I'm not hungry," Hutch told her.

"You still need to eat. I'm going to go into your kitchen and see what's out there that I can fix for all of us. While I'm doing that, why don't you call Captain Dobey and let him know we found you?"

Huggy laughed at the expression on Hutch's face as Alice disappeared into the kitchen

"I think you best listen to the lady," he told his blond friend. "If you don't, she might just force-feed you to get some food into you. You know how she feels about 'Handsome Hutch'."

Hutch scoffed at Alice's affectionate nickname for him. All the working girls liked Hutch because he treated them like ladies. But, Alice liked him a bit more than most and, down deep, Hutch had a soft spot for her, too. He knew that she'd had a rough life, but she seldom let things get her down. She always acted like a lady, even when she was working. She was never too aggressive or came on too strong like some of the other hookers did. And she was very selective when it came to her clientele. She'd been in the trade for a long time, but didn't have the rough, worn-out look of some of her peers.

Hutch settled down on the sofa and picked up the phone, dialing Dobey's home number.

"Dobey residence. May I help you?" a tiny voice said in his ear making Hutch smile.

"Hi, Rosie Posie," he said, "Is your daddy there?"

"Uncle Hutch!" Rosie Dobey cried in childish excitement. "Is that you? When are you coming to see me?"

"Soon, honey. I promise. Can I speak to your daddy, please? Police business."

"I'll go get him. He's in the kitchen with Mommy."

Hutch heard her lay the phone down and then the soft clatter of her feet on the hardwood floor.

After a short pause, Dobey's voice came on the line.

"I assume Huggy and your lady friend found you?"

"Yes, they did. What's this about a letter to Mrs. Starsky?"

"If Huggy told you about it, then you know as much as I do. But, there is a new development that might be connected."

"What's that?'

"I've had Babcock and Simmons talking to the nurses and doctors at the hospital. They found a sixteen-year-old nurse's aide who broke down and told them that one of the doctors ordered her to take the rings out of Starsky's personal property and give them to him. She was too intimidated by the doctor to refuse. He told her if she told anybody he'd make sure that she got fired."

"Did you bring the doctor in for questioning?"

"That's just it. He took an indefinite leave of absence from the hospital just after the shooting. Told his superiors that he was planning an extended family visit back east."

"Let me guess," Hutch said dryly. "In New York?"

"You got it."

"What's the good doctor's name?"

"McEntire. Robert McEntire. I've already notified the New York Police about his possible connection to the events out here, and they're starting an investigation on their end."

"Then it looks like I should head for New York," Hutch said in a fiercely determined voice.

"I figured that's what you'd want to do. I took you off leave and put you back on active duty. Take Huggy and the woman with you. Huggy's been a lot of help. I'm sure he and your lady friend would enjoy a mini-vacation in the Big Apple."

"I'll call Mrs. Starsky tonight to let her know I'm coming, and we'll leave first thing in the morning."

Hutch hung up the phone and took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. He felt more alive and confident than he had in weeks. Something had had lain dormant in his soul stirred and raised its head. Hope.


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10**

It was early evening the next day when the trio arrived at the Starsky residence in Brooklyn

Huggy had turned in the rental car in West Virginia, and they had traveled to New York in Hutch's vehicle. As he drove, Hutch went over the details of the case with Huggy, who gladly acted as his friend's sounding board. For the first time since the shooting, the old Hutch was back. Not only was he thinking and acting like a cop, but he was determined to find out exactly what had happened that dismal day in May.

They parked in front of the small, two-story, frame house, which was old and weathered, but still well cared-for. The yard was neatly moved, and a fresh coat of paint covered the window sills and front door. A colorful array of spring flowers was planted in a small plot beside the front stoop.

Rachel Starsky greeted them warmly. Alerted to their arrival by Hutch's phone call the previous evening, she had a meal prepared for them when they arrived. They sat down to enjoy a delicious pot roast with all the trimmings and a rich chocolate pudding for desert.

"I'm so glad you're here." Rachel smiled and reached out to pat Hutch's hand. "Maybe now we can finally get some answers."

"We have no proof, not yet anyway, that the letter isn't just some cruel hoax." Hutch reminded her solemnly. "But, taken into context with what we do know about the entire situation, there are some things that don't add up."

"Like David being accidentally cremated by the funeral home." Rachel said. "I never did entirely believe that. And the fact, that neither the hospital nor the funeral home ever gave me back his rings with the rest of his personal belongings, yet we all know that he never took them off."

"And don't forget that nobody ever saw his body after he got to the hospital," Huggy added. He glanced at Hutch. "You weren't exactly thinking straight when they came out and told us that he died on the table. None of us were."

"I still should have asked more questions, demanded some answers." Hutch turned his anger inward on himself. "Why didn't I ask to see him one last time?"

"Don't go beating yourself up, darling," Alice said in a soft, soothing voice. "You were too distraught at the time to think about things like that. But, you're here now, and we're going to find out the truth, at least about that letter and who had his rings and how they got them in the first place."

"We all know that the doctor from the hospital who intimidated that nurse's aide into getting him the rings is mixed up in all this somehow, and that he is supposed to be here in New York. So one thing we need to do is try and find him." Hutch said.

"What do we know about the good doctor?" Huggy asked.

"Not much," Hutch admitted. "His name is Robert McEntire, and he is a trauma surgeon. He's worked at the hospital in Bay City for a little over six months, transferring there from New York where he worked at Bellevue for almost six years. He graduated from NYU Medical School eight years ago, and then took a two-year program specializing in trauma surgery before going to work at Bellevue." Hutch took a sip of water before continuing. "I spoke to Captain Dobey this morning, and he filled me in on what the NYPD has found out so far. McEntire's family does live in New York, and they are all in the medical field. But, none of them claim to know where the good doctor is at the moment. They all said that, to the best of their knowledge, he is still in California."

"Well, if the letter to Mrs. Starsky was mailed from here in New York, then the good doctor had to get the rings to someone here somehow," Huggy mused.

"Right," Hutch agreed. "Which means either his family is lying and covering for him, or they really don't know that he's in the city."

"Or he's not in the city after all," Huggy added, "But has someone here working with him."

"So, none of this proves that David is still alive," Rachel said quietly.

"It doesn't prove that he isn't, either," Hutch pointed out.

"So what now?" Alice asked. She had been listening patiently, absorbing what was being said, processing it in her mind and coming to her own conclusions. "How do we find out what's true and what isn't?"

"Good ole fashioned police work," Hutch said with a tight smile. "That's how."

"Well, it's too late to get much done tonight. Why don't you all get a good night's sleep and start fresh in the morning?" Rachel suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Huggy said with an exaggerated stretch and yawn.

"Let me help you with these dishes," Alice said graciously as she stood up and began to clear the table.

While the women cleaned up the kitchen, Huggy and Hutch went into the living room to relax and continue their conversation.

"You really think Curly could still be alive?" Huggy kept his voice low so Mrs. Starsky wouldn't overhear him.

"I'm beginning to think he could be," Hutch admitted. He locked eyes with his friend. "At least I hope to God he is…I couldn't go through losing him all over again."

"But, why would someone go to all the trouble to make it look like he was dead, if he isn't?"

"That's one of the things I intend to find out," Hutch growled. "And I'll do whatever I have to do to get the answers I want."

Huggy smiled at Hutch's words. He had seen Hutch in avenging mode before. It was definitely a sight to behold. He pitied anyone who got in the big blond's way. The one thing that was sure to set him off quicker than anything else was to mess with his partner. And if this was some sort of elaborate cover-up, there had better be a damn good reason for it, or there would be hell to pay, and someone was going to get hurt and hurt badly.

Alice and Rachel joined them after finishing in the kitchen. They were all sitting, quietly talking, when the phone rang. Rachel excused herself to answer. A few minutes later, Hutch heard her voice rise anxiously.

"What? Where are you?"

Concerned by the alarm in her voice, Hutch rose to his feet just as she hung up the phone. She turned to face the others, her face pale and her hands trembling. Automatically, Huggy reached out to help her sit on the sofa.

"Rachel, what's wrong?" Hutch demanded in a concerned voice. He sat beside her and put a comforting arm around her shoulders.

"That…that was Nicky," she said in a trembling voice. "All he said was that he is okay, and then just before he hung up, he said not to worry, that David is, too…." She looked at Hutch with a stricken expression. "What is going on, Ken? Where are my sons?"

"I don't know," Hutch told her solemnly. "But, I swear to you…I will find out, one way or another and I will bring them both home safely to you."


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER 11**

Alice fixed Rachel a cup of tea while Hutch began to question her about the last time she had seen Nicky.

"It was just before David was shot," she stated in a trembling tone. "He came in and said he had to leave for a few days…something about a job lead. I really wasn't paying that much attention because Nicky was always going off somewhere for a few days."

"He didn't try to contact you after the shooting?"

"No, and I thought that was unusual. Especially after it ended up on the news here. But, David's always been the responsible one, not Nicky." Rachel sighed heavily. "I know he loves David, but they are as different as night and day. I don't think I've been a very good mother to either one of my sons."

"You've done the best you could under the circumstances," Hutch consoled her. "You sent Starsky to Bay City to protect him, and he's the man he is today because of you."

"But, I couldn't protect Nicky from the things that I sent David away from. So, that means it's my fault he's the way he is. He was all I had left and I couldn't bear to lose him too…so I looked the other way and look what happened."

"He's still an adult who makes his own choices; you're not responsible for that. Nicky's selfish and self-centered, but none of that is your fault."

"I just don't know what to think anymore." Rachel brushed a single tear from her cheek. "I was just starting to accept the fact that David was gone when I got that letter…and now this phone call from Nicky…"

"I promise you, I will get to the bottom of it," Hutch told her solemnly. "For both our sakes."

"And I'm going to help," Huggy declared.

"Me too," Alice added. "Even if that means just staying here with you so you won't be alone."

"Thank you…thank you all. My David is truly blessed to have friends like you in his life." She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "I think I'll go to bed now. I'm tired."

"Get some rest," Hutch said with a gentle smile. "We'll start looking for answers first thing in the morning."

Rachel rose to her feet and started to walk away, then paused at the bottom of the steps that led to the second floor and said, "You should start by talking to Joe Durniak's son, Joe Jr. If anyone can help, he can."

Hutch nodded.

Joe Durniak Sr. had been a mob boss who had agreed to testify at a grand jury hearing. He had been in protective custody for seven months, and Starsky and Hutch had been the detectives in charge of protecting him. He had been killed before he could testify, and his murder had led Starsky and Hutch into uncovering an elaborate ring of ordinary people who were being brainwashed into becoming assassins.

But, Joe Durniak had also been a childhood friend of Michael Starsky, and they had remained friends even as adults. They operated on opposite sides of the law, but that didn't not stop them from being friends. When Michael Starsky was gunned down in his own front yard, Joe had paid for the funeral and, unknown to most people; he had given Rachel the money to send her oldest son to California.

His son, Joe Jr., had taken over the family business after his father died, and he was in the position to have his finger on the very pulse of the city. Hutch remembered Starsky talking about playing with Joe Jr. when they were kids, so it appeared that Joe Jr. also had a tie to the Starsky family.

 **XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

After a restless night for everyone, they were all up early the next morning. Rachel made a big breakfast with pancakes, eggs, fried potatoes, and bacon. Although the Starsky family was Jewish, they did not observe the kosher rules concerning food. As a result, the Starsky family's background was a curious mix of Jewish and Gentile customs.

While the others ate, Rachel made some phone calls and arranged a meeting for Hutch with Joe Jr. at nine A.M. at his downtown office. After breakfast, Hutch and Huggy left the house to keep the appointment while Alice stayed behind with Rachel.

Durniak Enterprises had an office in a twelve-story building in downtown Manhattan. To the general public, the office was the headquarters for a successful import/export business that had been started by Joe Sr. over thirty years ago.

But, law enforcement knew that it was actually a front for the other businesses operated by the Durniak family. That included prostitution, numbers running, and racketeering. The one thing that Joe had always insisted that his organization stay away from was the drug trade, no matter how profitable it might be. And, unlike the majority of the mob bosses in the city he did not use random violence to control his empire or his employees. When Jr. took over the business, he made it clear to all of his employees that his father's standards would still be upheld.

At the twelfth floor, Huggy and Hutch stepped off the elevator into a large, open room with a plush, beige carpet on the floor and wall-to-wall windows that overlooked the city. Behind a desk sat a beautiful redhead with brown eyes and a figure that left little to the imagination. She smiled brightly at Hutch and said, "Welcome to Durniak Enterprises. May I help you?"

"My name is Ken Hutchinson and this is Mr. Brown. We have an appointment with Mr. Durniak."

"Yes, he is expecting you. Down the hall to your left. It's the last door on the right."

They followed her directions and located the office. Hutch knocked lightly to announce their arrival and then opened the door. The inner office had the same plush carpet and spectacular view as the reception area. Hutch's experienced eye told him that the framed art on the walls was authentic, not cheap knock-offs.

The man behind the desk was in his late forties with the same steely eyes and heavy jowls as his father. When he spoke, he had the same raspy voice from too many cigarettes and too much booze.

"Welcome to my office, gentlemen. I'm sure you realize, that since I do not know you personally, you are here merely as a favor to Rachel Starsky."

"We understand that," Hutch replied. "I believe Mrs. Starsky explained to you the purpose of our visit."

"Yes, she did, and I am willing to help you in any way I can." He reached out and handed Hutch a folded piece of paper. "Go to this address. There you will find part of the answers you seek."

"Thank you," Hutch said quietly. He turned and left the room with Huggy trailing behind. Once they were out of the building, Hutch unfolded the paper, reading the address and the directions on how to get there. It was someplace in China Town.

Thirty minutes later, Hutch pulled up in front of a Chinese restaurant. The sign on the door said it opened at eleven, and it wasn't even ten yet. Hutch knocked on the closed door and waited for a response. After a minute or two, the door opened just far enough for a young oriental girl to peep out at the two men. She smiled and handed Hutch a sealed envelope and then shut the door securely.

Hutch glanced at Huggy and shrugged his shoulders as they walked back to Hutch's car and climbed inside. He tore open the envelope and took out two pictures. One was of Nick Starsky that had obviously been taken without his knowledge. In it, he was tied to a chair and blindfolded. But, the second picture was the one that took Hutch's breath away. It showed Starsky lying on a hospital bed hooked up to a variety of tubes and machines. He was thin and pale with his eyes closed, but he appeared to be very much alive

"I'll be damned," Huggy whispered. "Curly is alive."

"It sure as hell looks that way," Hutch said quietly, peering closely at both pictures hoping to find a further clue that would help him find them. "The question is…where the hell is he?"


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12**

"So what now?" Huggy asked as he looked at the pictures once more.

"There's nothing we can do but wait until we have some idea where Starsky and Nicky might be, or who might have them," Hutch said with an edge to his voice that Huggy recognized immediately. Hutch, the badass cop, had taken over. And God help anyone who got in his way.

"Well, how do we find that out?"

Hutch smiled, a thin, hard smile that never made it to his eyes. "We tear this fucking city apart if we have to, and drag every rat who might be able to help us out of the sewer."

"But, how are we supposed to do that? This ain't Bay City. You don't have the connections here that you do back home."

"Maybe not…but Joe Durniak does, and that son of bitch knows more about what is going on then he's telling us."

"Yeah, and he could have us both wiped out if we step on his toes…especially on his own turf." Huggy pointed out.

"Maybe you should stay with Alice and Rachel. I can handle this by myself."

"No way. If we find Curly and I have to tell him you're dead or hurt, then I'm the one he's gonna kill…not you."

"Have it your way. Just stay out of mine." Hutch's tone warned Huggy not to argue. The conversation was over, and Hutch's mind was made up.

Hutch drove back to the Starsky home where he reported on his meeting with Joe Durniak. Rachel listened to his report in silence as she looked at the pictures of her two sons.

"At least we know they're both alive," Alice said in a relieved voice. "But, why would someone go to so much trouble to make everyone think that Starsky is dead?"

"Someone who was trying to protect him…to keep him safe," Rachel said quietly. Unshed tears glistened in her eyes as she locked eyes with Hutch.

'But, how does Nicky fit into this whole thing?" Huggy asked as he tried to put the pieces of the puzzle together in his mind.

"Maybe they were trying to keep him safe too," Alice suggested. "To keep someone from using him to try and find his brother."

"But, Nicky's tied up and blindfolded in the picture," Huggy pointed out needlessly.

"Because he knows who is behind this," Hutch growled, "or he was in on it from the beginning."

"Or because my Nicky was being Nicky," Rachel said with a sad, little smile. "He tried to run the show or stepped on somebody's toes, and that was the only way to shut him up or keep him in line."

"Guess we'll find out which one it is when we find them," Hutch said. He reached and took back the pictures, sticking them in his shirt pocket for safe keeping, where they would stay, close to his heart until he found its other half.

"Maybe that doctor from back home came here to take care of Starsky," Alice suggested. "He would still need a lot of medical care and treatment. Maybe they didn't want to risk putting him in a hospital here."

"That would make sense," Hutch said as he considered her scenario.

"So are you going to go back and talk to Joe Jr?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, tomorrow. I know he knows more than he told us, and, one way or the other I'm going to find out what it is," Hutch said in a determined voice. Gone was the grief-stricken man who was determined to drink himself to death rather than face the future without his partner and best friend at his side. And, in his place, was a man who suddenly had a new reason for living. Hope.

Rachel and Alice fixed supper while Huggy and Hutch relaxed in the living room, both lost in their own thoughts as they processed the information that they had uncovered so far. It seemed like each new lead just led to more unanswered questions.

When the phone rang, they all focused their attention on the innocent-looking telephone sitting on a stand in the corner of the room. Bracing herself, Rachel took a deep breath as she picked up the receiver.

"Hello?" She gave a heartfelt sigh of relief when she heard the voice of a neighbor with whom she often went out shopping. She listened for a moment and then said, "No, I'm afraid I can't tomorrow. I have some guests visiting from California. Maybe next week."

She hung up and turned to look at Hutch and Huggy apologetically. "For a minute there, I was afraid to answer it. I thought it might be Nicky again."

"Nobody can blame you for that, sugar," Alice said. "I was a mite nervous myself."

"We all were," Huggy said with a uneasy laugh.

"I think we all should get some rest." Rachel said as she absently brushed a bit of invisible lint from her beige slacks. "Tomorrow could be another long day."

"I agree," Alice said as she joined Rachel by the stairway. "But, first we can't let that delicious supper you fixed go to waste. After that, you can go lie down, and the men can help me clean the kitchen."

Rachel nodded, and the two women walked back to the kitchen. Hutch and Huggy followed. It wasn't hard to have an appetite when faced with a table of Rachel Starsky's home cooking.

Rachel had fixed creamy mashed potatoes and a huge, mixed salad to compliment Alice's contribution: southern fried chicken with homemade gravy and flaky biscuits. Hutch and Huggy both had coffee while Rachel and Alice had sweet tea.

After they had all eaten their fill, Rachel retired to her room while Alice, Huggy, and Hutch cleaned the kitchen and did the dishes.

Once Rachel was safely out of the room, Alice said quietly, "Do you really think we're going to find Starsky and his brother?"

"One way or the other, we'll find them," Hutch said passionately. "Because I'm not leaving until I do."

"I don't mean to be the bad guy here," Alice said softly. "But, what if you find 'em and it's too late?"

"Then somebody is going to pay," Hutch said in a fierce, almost deadly, voice that sent a chill down Huggy's spine. "For everything they've put us all through…"


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER 13**

"Sir! You can't go in there!" the woman behind the desk cried in alarm as a determined Hutch, followed by Huggy, brushed past her and entered Joe Durniak's private office.

Durniak's head snapped up, his eyes flashing with angerl, at the abrupt invasion of his privacy. He stood up, glaring at his two unexpected visitors.

"What's the meaning of this intrusion?"

"I think you know why we're here," Hutch growled. "Where's my partner?"

"You have no jurisdiction here, Detective Hutchinson. And your hostile attitude certainly does not intimidate me. Why don't you tell me exactly what you want from me?"

"I want to know where my partner is," Hutch said, slowly putting an emphasis on each word.

"And what makes you think I know anything more than what I already told you?" Durniak asked.

"Because this is your turf, and, if you're half the man that your father was, then nothing goes on here without you knowing everything there is to know about it," Hutch said in a cold, deadly voice. "Not to mention the fact that you have a personal stake in this because of your connection to the Starsky family."

Durniak stared at Hutch for several long minutes before answering. Finally, he nodded and sat back down at his desk, gesturing for Hutch and Huggy to have a seat, too. They sat in the two chairs facing the desk and looked at the mob boss.

"I can assure you that both David and Nicholas are safe. They are under currently under my protection and have been since David was brought to New York."

"Keep talking," Hutch demanded gruffly. "And you better not leave anything out."

"I am not the one who started this. That was the Federal agents who were investigating James Gunther back in California. They knew about the planned hit on you and David, but they didn't know in time to stop it. When David survived the shooting, they arranged to make it look as if he had died to keep anyone from making any further attempts on his life. When I found out what they had done, I stepped in and arranged to have David brought here under my protection."

"You didn't trust the feds?" Hutch said with a snort. He didn't much care for the feds either, especially when they tried to throw their weight around.

"My father was murdered while he was supposed to be under the protection of the feds." Joe Jr. said with a smirk. "Why should I trust them? I also found Nicky, who was shacked up with some showgirl, and had him brought to me so the assassins couldn't go after him. too." He smiled thinly. "Nicky wasn't in a very cooperative mood, so I had to have him restrained for a few days until he saw things my way. I had him call Rachel as soon as possible to try and put her mind at ease. I knew you were in the city and that you'd come around."

"Then why not tell me that in the beginning instead of playing games with those pictures?" Hutch growled, struggling to keep his anger in check.

"Because I needed to make sure that David's safety wouldn't be comprised by telling you where he was. I checked with my west coast connections, and they assured me that things were wrapped up back there, so it was safe to tell you where Nicky and David were."

"What do you mean things are wrapped up back home?" Hutch demanded.

"Certain associates of mine took care of the two men who did the shooting, and steps were taken to ensure that Gunther's connection was confirmed. And as far as the feds were concerned, they were willing to step aside as long as they could take credit for bringing down Gunther."

"Where is my partner?"

"He's at private sanitarium that I own. Nicky is there too." Joe Jr. scribbled the address on a piece of paper and handed it to Hutch. "David has been put in a medically induced coma to help him heal from his injuries. He is still in critical condition. The doctor in charge of his care can tell you more."

"The good Doctor McEntire from Bay City."

"Yes. He was repaying an old debt. My father put him through medical school and gave him money to care for his family until he established his practice."

Hutch stood up, signaling that the meeting was over. He held out his hand, and Durniak did the same. The two men exchanged a firm handshake.

"Thank you," Hutch said in a sincere tone. He turned and left the office.

Once they were outside the office, Huggy looked at Hutch with a huge grin. "At least we know where Curly is and that he's still alive. Are you going to tell Rachel?"

"After I see him for myself and talk to this Doctor McEntire," Hutch said grimly.

"You don't trust Durniak?"

"I don't have any reason to trust him. I believe him when he says he was behind having Starsky brought here, I'm just not sure that I believe his reason for not telling us what was going on any sooner than he did. Especially Rachel. Instead, he let all of us continue to believe that he was dead."

Hutch drove to the address he had been given. It was in an upscale neighborhood in Manhattan. The sign on the fence read: **REST HAVEN SANITARIUM. PRIVATE PROPERTY. AUTHORIZED PERSONS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT.**

Hutch drove up the long, tree-lined drive that led to a large, imposing, six-story, brick building with large courtyards and pathways that wound through the well-maintained property. Hutch parked, and the two men walked to the main entrance where they were stopped by a uniformed guard.

"I'm sorry, gentlemen. This is a private facility, and no one is allowed inside without prior authorization."

"Call Joe Durniak. He'll vouch for us," Hutch said.

At the use of Durniak's name, the guard's demeanor changed immediately. Turning aside, he spoke quietly into a hand-held walkie-talkie and then turned back to the pair with a thin smile. "I'm sorry, sir. The patient you're looking for is in room 610. The elevators are down the hall on your left."

Following his instructions, Hutch and Huggy found the elevators and took one to the sixth floor. The doors opened on a wide-open area with a nurse's station directly in front of the elevator. An older woman with short, gray hair and steely blue eyes smiled at them as they stepped out of the elevator.

"Good day, gentlemen," she said. "Welcome to Rest Haven. Room 610 is at the end of the hall behind me. I paged the doctor, and he will be here shortly to talk to you."

"Thank you," Hutch said with a curt nod. As they followed her directions, Hutch immediately noticed that all the rooms they passed were empty. It was apparent that Starsky was the only patient on the floor.

Reaching room 610, Hutch paused and took a deep breath. Exchanging a glance with Huggy, who tossed him an encouraging smile, the two men stepped into the room.


	14. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER 14**

Hutch cautiously approached the bed sitting in the middle of the room. His heart pounded in his chest, and he could feel the hairs rising on the back of his neck. For a brief moment, he thought about turning and bolting from the room, but he forced himself to keep moving forward.

He looked at the figure lying on the bed. The face was thin, almost skeletal, with the skin stretched tightly over the cheekbones and the eyes sunken in their sockets. The rest of the body was the same: Hutch could count every rib in the man's chest.

Various machines surrounded the bed with tubes and monitors attached to the man's emaciated body. Soft beeps filled the air from the machine monitoring the man's heartbeat.

Tears fell unchecked down Hutch's face as he reached out a trembling hand and clasped the thin, bony fingers of the figure lying on the bed before him.

"Starsky…." He whispered in an awed voice as he sat down heavily in the chair beside the bed. "God, Starsk…you're really alive…." Hutch's shoulders began to shake with silent sobs as he bowed his head.

Fighting back his own tears, Huggy Bear stepped up behind his friend and put a comforting hand on Hutch's shoulder to steady him. Their journey had ended. Starsky was alive. He didn't look like himself and was obviously still in very poor condition, but he was alive. Like a miracle from God, Starsky had come back from the dead.

Hutch raised his head and wiped away his tears with his free hand. Leaning closer to his best friend's curl-covered ear, he whispered "I'm here, babe…Hutch is here and I'm not leaving until you're well enough to walk out that door with me."

Despite his heavily sedated condition, the heart monitor began to beat louder and faster as some part of Starsky's unconscious mind responded to Hutch's voice.

"He's knows you're here," a man's voice said from the doorway.

Hutch's head turned sharply at the sound of a stranger's voice. A tall, well groomed man in his early to mid-forties, stood there. He was casually dressed in faded jeans and a polo shirt, but still managed to give off an air of authority.

"Dr. McEntire, I presume," Hutch said in a carefully controlled voice.

"Yes, I'm Robert McEntire." the man acknowledged. "I've already spoken to Joey, so I know who you are, and I know that you know how your partner ended up here."

"I want to know everything there is to know about his condition," Hutch said firmly.

"Of course. Why don't we go down the hall to my office?'

Hutch shook his head and growled, "No. I'm staying right here. Now that I've found out that he's still alive, I'm not leaving this room until he can leave it too. So start talking, Doc. And don't leave anything out."

"As you already know, your partner was shot point blank in the torso with an automatic weapon. He was hit five times, one shot hit him in the chest, one hit him in the left shoulder, and the other three bullets hit him in the back after he was spun around by the first two shots. He suffered massive blood loss at the scene, and his heart stopped twice in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. It's a miracle he even survived that long. He should have died at the scene."

Hutch's face paled as he listened to the doctor's narrative, and McEntire paused momentary to allow him to absorb what he had been told so far.

"Go on," Hutch told him, a bit impatiently.

"He suffered massive damage from the gunshot wounds and none of the doctors on hand expected him to even survive surgery. The bullet to his shoulder tore through the muscle and shattered his left shoulder blade when it exited his body. The shot to his chest miraculously missed all of his vital organs, but it did collapse his right lung and caused internal bleeding. It also exited through his back.

The three shots to his back did the most damage. One bullet ruptured his spleen, causing massive bleeding; it also broke three ribs which caused further internal damage. A second bullet came dangerously close to his spine and ended up lodged in his liver. Neither of those two bullets exited his body. The third bullet tore through his lower intestines and abdomen, exiting his body through his left groin. We had to remove his spleen and part of his liver. The immediate concern, however, was to get the massive internal hemorrhaging under control, which took some time. We were forced to replace almost all of his blood supply.

His left lung was shredded from pieces of broken ribs and one of the bullets which shattered on impart with his ribs. The third bullet also did substantial damage to his lower intestine and stomach. His heart stopped again during the surgery, but we managed to bring him back."

"Who else was in on the cover-up?" Hutch asked. "You're not the doctor that told us he was dead."

"No, I'm not. That was actually a federal agent pretending to be a doctor. The Feds took over while your partner was still in surgery and set things in motion to make it look as if he had died on the table. They spirited him to another part of the hospital where he was for three days until Joey intervened and arranged to have him air-lifted here. I've been his primary physician from the start. My specialty area is trauma care." The doctor paused then went on when Hutch didn't appear to have any questions. "I had David put into a medically induced coma to give his body a chance to heal. He was brought out from under sedation three weeks ago, but he has remained in a coma. The increase in his heart rate when you spoke to him is the first sign we've had that he is aware of his surroundings, at least on some level."

"You don't know these two, doc," Huggy said with a smile. "You wait and see, Curly will start to get better quick now that Blondie is here."

"I've seen the benefits of having a loved one close by during a difficult recovery. I was hoping that having his brother here might help, but that didn't have the outcome I had hoped for."

Huggy snorted. "You got that right. Curly and his brother aren't that close. Hutch here is his real brother, even if it ain't by blood."

"Well, that would explain his brother's indifference and animosity."

"Where is Nicky?" Hutch asked.

"In a room down the hall. Do you want to see him?"

Hutch shook his head. "No. I want you to send him home with my friend here. His mother needs him there, and she also needs to know that her oldest son is still alive. I'm sure she'll want to see him immediately."

"All right. I'm sure that can be arranged. I will also have another bed moved in here since you will be staying."

"I'll be staying," Hutch repeated firmly. "And I have his medical power of attorney, so any medical treatments from now on will be cleared with me first."

"Very well," the doctor said in a resigned tone. Joey had ordered him to do whatever Hutch told him to do and not to argue. He didn't have to like it. He just had to do it. Doctor McEntire turned and left the room.

"So what now?" Huggy asked once the doctor had left the room.

"You're going to take Nicky home and fill Rachel and Alice in on what we found out. Rachel will probably want to see Starsky right away, but try to get her to wait until tomorrow."

Huggy nodded. He knew that Hutch needed some time alone with his partner. He scowled when Nick Starsky strolled though the doorway.

"Hey, man," he greeted Hutch in a cocky tone. "It's about time you found us. I was beginning to think that nobody was ever gonna show up."

"Shut up, Nicky." Hutch said quietly.

"Hey, don't tell me what to do," Nicky objected, "I didn't ask to be cooped up here with Davey. Joey had me snatched and brought here against my will."

"And probably saved your life by doing that," Huggy sneered. "Or you could have ended up like your brother."

"I ain't that stupid. He's the cop…not me."

"Shut. Up. Nicky,"

Hutch repeated his command in a hard, cold voice, warning Nicky to listen this time or pay the consequences.

Nicky wisely decided to heed the warning. There was no love lost between Hutch and the younger Starsky brother. Nicky knew just where his brother's loyalties lay, and he knew that it wasn't with him. He might be David's brother by blood, but Hutch was his brother by choice.

"You're going home with Huggy," Hutch continued. "Your mother needs you there. I'll be staying here with your brother until he's well enough to leave."

"Come on, little brother," Huggy said. "Let's go." He gestured for Nicky to step back into the hallway. With a wink at Hutch, Huggy followed him out the door.

Hutch sat there, staring into Starsky's beloved face for several minutes. He was overwhelmed with a sense of relief, gratitude, and a renewed hope for the future. He was no longer alone. He had found the other half of his heart, ow he was complete.

"God, Starsk…you have no idea how much I've missed you. I came so close to losing it…to eating my gun. I just didn't want to be here anymore without you. I tried to crawl into a bottle and not come out. I just didn't care anymore…about anything. I still can't believe you're alive…" Hutch whispered his confession in a broken voice. Exhausted, mentally and emotionally, he laid his head down on the side of the bed and fell asleep, till clutching his partner's hand.


	15. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER 15**

Hutch gave a soft groan as he opened his eyes and stretched to relieve the ache in his stiff muscles. He slowly rotated his head from side to side to work out the kinks in his neck. He was getting too old to sleep sitting in a chair. He glanced at the bed, his eyes automatically accessing Starsky's condition.

His color seemed a little better, and he seemed to be breathing easier, too. Hutch took both as positive signs. He reached out to adjust the pillow beneath Starsky's head.

"Morning, Partner. Sure hope you wake up soon. I can't wait to see those blue eyes or hear you ragging on me about something. Then I'll really know that you're going to be okay."

There was no answer from the silent figure on the bed, but then, Hutch hadn't really expected to get one. Not yet, anyway.

Dr. McEntire came into the room and went to the bed to examine his patient. "Good morning, Sergeant Hutchinson," he said cordially.

Hutch nodded a greeting, but did not speak. He watched closely as the doctor checked Starsky's pupils and took his vital signs. When the doctor reached for the chart hanging at the foot of the bed and opened it, Hutch said impatiently, "How is he?"

"He's doing quite well, as a matter of fact. His vital signs are strong, and his pupils are responding to the light. That's an improvement from a few days ago. I think your friend was right yesterday. You may be the best medicine for Sergeant Starsky after all."

"It's what we do," Hutch said with a fond glance at his best friend's face. "When one of us is hurt or sick, the other one has always been there to do whatever is needed."

"He's lucky to have someone like you in his life. Not many people do." The doctor scribbled some quick notes to the chart and shut it, hanging it back at the foot of the bed. "And since you intend on staying here until your friend is on his feet, I've arranged to have another bed moved in here for you. That should be more comfortable than sleeping in that chair each night."

"Thank you. I appreciate that."

Hutch turned his attention back to Starsky, barely noticing as the doctor left the room.

A few minutes later, a nurse came in carrying a breakfast tray for Hutch. She set it on the bedside table and left.

Hutch lifted the lid, mildly surprised to find a stack of pancakes with maple syrup, four strips of bacon, and an order of scrambled eggs with cheese. The meal was finished off with a cup of steaming coffee with cream. It looked and smelled better than any hospital food Hutch had had in the past.

He took a bite of the pancakes and closed his eyes in pleasure. Opening them, he looked at Starsky with a grin and said, "You don't know what you're missing, buddy…this is fantastic. It sure doesn't taste like any hospital food I've ever had."

He almost choked on his food when Starsky made a muffled sound that almost sounded like a snort. Forgetting about his meal, he leaned in close, looking intently at his partner's face.

"Can you hear me, Starsk? Come on…give me a sign…show me you're still in there…" 

Nothing but silence. Hutch sighed in resignation and returned to his meal, while still keeping a close watch on his partner for any sign that he was aware of his surroundings or any subtle changes in his condition.

After he had eaten, a nurse returned to take his empty tray. As she picked it up, she said, "Hi, my name is Karen, and I'll be back in about fifteen minutes to give your friend a bed bath."

"If you don't mind, I'd rather do that. I've done it before. Just tell me where to find the stuff I need."

"I suppose that would be alright. Everything you need should be in the bathroom."

Hutch dismissed her with a curt nod.

He crossed to the bathroom and quickly gathered the necessary supplies. He closed the door to the room on his way back to the bed. Leaning in close to his partner, he said softly, "I'm gonna get you cleaned up, pal. Should make you feel better."

He wet a cloth in the warm soapy water and gently washed Starsky's face and neck. Moving slowly, he did his arms and hands next, then moved to his chest and stomach. He relished the feel of the warm, living flesh beneath his hands. He slipped a clean gown on Starsky before moving lower. As he washed the familiar body he noted the new scars that marred the dusky skin, scars that were still red with puckered edges.

When he was finished he pulled the sheet up to Starsky's waist and then returned the supplies to the bathroom. When he opened the door, he found Rachel Starsky waiting in the hall to see her son.

"How is he?" she asked anxiously.

"Come in and see for yourself," Hutch told her with a small smile. He took her arm and gently led her across the room to her son's side. Tears fell down her cheeks as she reached out and gently caressed her oldest child's face. She whispered to him softly in a language Hutch assumed was Yiddish.

He had heard Starsky speak the same language a time or two when they had a Jewish victim who didn't speak English very well. Starsky had explained to him that Yiddish was more commonly spoken between Jews daily while Hebrew was spoken in the Synagogue and during their prayers. While Starsky also spoke some Vietnamese, he couldn't seem to quite get the hang of Spanish, which Hutch could speak fluently. As in every other aspect of their lives, it was just one of the things that balanced them out perfectly.

"He's lost so much weight…" Rachel said in a quiet voice, her eyes lingering on her son's face.

"Once he's awake, he'll make up for lost time in a hurry," Hutch told her with a grin. "You know how he likes to eat."

"Yes, I know. I'll have to make all his favorite dishes to help fatten him up," Rachel said. She sat down in the chair Hutch had spent the night in. Reaching out to take Starsky's right hand in her own, she began humming softly.

Secure with the knowledge that Starsky couldn't be in better hands, Hutch took the opportunity to go to the men's room. When he was finished, he found a pay phone in the hallway and placed a long distance call to Captain Dobey.

"I found him, Cap," he said when the burly black man's voice echoed in his ear. "Starsky's alive. I found the good doctor, too. He's been taking care of him."

"What's he doing in New York, and what the hell is going on there?" Dobey demanded gruffly.

"The Feds were behind making it look like he was killed," Hutch explained. "They thought they were protecting him. Joe Durniak's son is the one who spirited him to New York. He didn't trust the Feds after what happened to his father while he was under their protection."

"What hospital is he in?"

"He's in a private facility owned by Durniak. Up until three weeks ago, the doctor had him in a medically induced coma. They stopped the drugs, but he's still in a coma."

"Hopefully things will improve now that you're there," Dobey said confidently. "Are Huggy and that women still with you?"

"Yes, they are. They're staying with Rachel. I'm staying with Starsky."

"I wouldn't expect you to be anywhere else."

"I'll keep you posted on his condition. I need to get back to him."

"You do that," Dobey said. "And, Hutchinson, good work." There was a soft click as the Captain hung up.

Hutch returned the phone to the cradle and returned to Starsky's room, where he should be. Where he needed to be.


	16. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER 16**

Over the next few days, Hutch gradually took over most of Starsky's personal care. Starsky's physical condition also continued to improve dramatically, and he began to show positive signs of coming out of the coma.

Rachel came to see her son everyday, along with Huggy and Alice. Nicky had disappeared again and showed no concern for his brother's well being. Captain Dobey called at least once a day for a progress report, pleased to hear that Starsky was beginning to improve.

It had been a quiet morning, and it looked to be a quiet afternoon. Hutch was sitting at Starsky's side, talking to him quietly. From his own experiences when he was hurt and in the hospital, he knew that even if he was asleep or unconscious, he could always sense Starsky's presence and hear his voice. He knew that Starsky was the same. Since early morning, Starsky had been turning his head towards the sound of Hutch's voice.

"You need to wake up soon, buddy…I'm getting tired of hearing the sound of my own voice," Hutch said with a chuckle. "I promise I'll never complain about you talking too much again. I miss the sound of your voice, even when you're yelling."

Hutch caught his breath when he noticed a slight flutter of Starsky's eyelashes. He held his breath, watching closely as a sliver of blue showed from beneath those impossibly long lashes.

"Starsky? Are you awake, Buddy? Can you hear me? It's Hutch…I'm here. I'm here."

Those beloved eyes closed, but Hutch's heart beat with joy. Starsky was coming back to him! The doctor had told him that when Starsky did wake up, he would be very weak from weeks of inactivity. Despite the daily therapy exercises to keep his muscle from contracting, he would be too weak to walk and any sudden shift in his position would cause his blood pressure to plummet and cause him to pass out.

His physical injuries were healing, but there had been severe damage to one lung and his stomach. Both organs would require more treatment, and the damage to his lung could be permanent. That could not be fully evaluated until Starsky was conscious.

Hutch reached out and took Starsky's hand, needing the comfort of that close contact with his partner. His heart leapt with joy when he felt those fingers slowly tighten around his hand, another sign that Starsky was beginning to wake up.

Hutch continued talking to him throughout the afternoon, but Starsky stubbornly remained in that twilight world somewhere between unconsciousness and being completely awake. But, Hutch could be a patient man when he had to be.

By evening, Hutch's voice was hoarse and his throat was sore, but still, he kept talking. He refused to consider any other outcome except a positive one. He had suffered through what he believed was Starsky's death, wishing for death himself, now that he had found him; he wasn't going to lose him a second time. He knew if that happened, they might as well dig two graves, because Hutch wouldn't survive losing the other half of his heart a second time.

It was almost midnight before Hutch finally dozed off, still sitting by Starsky's side, holding his hand. He was startled awake when he thought he heard Starsky's voice saying his name. His eyes flew open, immediately seeking his partner's face. Starsky's eyes were still closed, and there didn't appear to be any change in his condition. Realizing that he must have been dreaming, Hutch's eyes began to drift shut again.

"Hu….ssss…hhh…"

His eyes flew open, and he knew this time he wasn't dreaming. Starsky's eyes were still closed, but Hutch knew that he had heard him say his name. It had been barely audible, the beloved voice raspy and dry from weeks of disuse, but it had been Starsky's voice.

"I'm here, Starsk," Hutch whispered in a curl-covered ear. "I'm right here. Can you open your eyes for me?"

He held his breath, watching and waiting. After several long minutes, Starsky's eyes opened just enough to show a sliver of blue. Hutch waited with bated breath, watching as Starsky struggled to open his eyes wider.

Finally, their eyes met. Starsky's gaze was dazed and confused, but he was awake. When his eyes started to drift shut, Hutch said sharply,

"Stay with me, Starsk. Don't close your eyes. You need to stay awake."

Compelled by his partner's voice to obey, Starsky opened his eyes again. This time his gaze automatically sought out his partner's eyes and held Hutch's gaze. Hutch grinned broadly and let out a whoop that could be heard in the hallway. A nurse hurried into the room to find out the reason for the sudden noise.

"He's awake!" Hutch told her, holding back the tears that threatened to fall. "He's awake."

"I'll page the doctor right away," the nurse said when she looked at her patient and saw that his eyes really were open. She hurried from the room.

As Hutch sat there, staring into his best friend's eyes, he saw Starsky's eyes slowly clear as he became more alert. In that same raspy voice he had heard in his head earlier, Starsky said,

"Hu…sssh?"

"Yeah, pal. It's me, it's Hush…" Hutch smiled at the way Starsky always slurred his name when he was drugged or not completely awake. "You're in the hospital, and you're going to be just fine."

"Shot…"

"Yeah," Hutch's voice broke. "You were shot." He didn't elaborate. That could wait until Starsky was stronger. He felt Starsky's fingers tighten around his hand and knew that he understood.

Ten minutes later, Dr. McEntire entered the room. He immediately moved to Starsky's side and began examining him. Sensing Starsky's irritation and agitation at the unexpected intrusion, Hutch sought to reassure him,

"It's okay, pal. This is your doctor. This is Dr. McEntire. He just wants to make sure none of your marbles are rolling around loose in there." He gave McEntire a stern look. He would have a little conversation with the doctor about his bedside manner later.

Finishing with his examination, the doctor looked at Hutch and said, "It does appear that David has come out of the coma. I'll schedule some tests starting tomorrow so we can do a full evaluation of his condition and mental status." With those parting words, the doctor left the room, leaving the two detectives alone.

Hutch focused his attention back on his partner. He could tell that even being awake for a few minutes was rapidly depleting Starsky's meager supply of energy. He smiled fondly and said, "Go head and get some sleep. I'll be right here when you wake up. He nodded at the bed sitting beside Starsky's. "See, I even got my own bed to sleep in."

Starsky hesitated momentarily, then slowly closed his eyes but, this time, he fell into a natural sleep instead of a coma.

Hutch watched him sleep for several long minutes before finally letting go of his hand. He tended to his own evening ritual, climbed into the bed next to his partner and let himself fall into the first restful sleep he'd had in months.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

Over the next few days, Starsky slowly became more alert and responsive. He also became more agitated and impatient. Being confined to a hospital bed was simply not in his nature. But, he was too weak to get up despite his best efforts to try. It was only when the doctor threatened to sedate him again (which Hutch adamantly refused to allow) that Starsky finally agreed to give himself more time to regain his strength and stamina.

Now that the two partners were finally reunited, Huggy and Alice had returned to California and their own lives. Hutch would forever be grateful for everything they had done to help him find Starsky and bring them back together. If it hadn't been for them, he might never have known that Starsky was still alive.

Rachel came to see her son every day, bringing him plates of his favorite foods to help him regain the weight he had lost during his confinement. She meant well, but his healing stomach couldn't handle most solid foods yet and most of the time the food came back up. In the evenings, Starsky would whine until Hutch left the hospital long enough to get him ice cream treats and thick, rich shakes from a nearby Dairy Queen. With his stomach still healing, the treats were sometimes all he could keep down.

Hutch sat beside his partner, watching as Starsky slowly fed himself the hot fudge Sunday. His movements were slow and cautious, nothing like his normal habit of inhaling his food. But, he was gaining weight, and his familiar features were becoming more and more visible each day as he lost the gaunt, hollow-eyed look.

It had been a stressful morning. The physical therapist had taught Hutch the exercises the hospital staff had been using to strengthen Starsky's muscles and keep them from contracting. The exercises were painful, something Starsky had been spared while he was unconscious.

"I wanna go home," Starsky said in a quiet voice that tugged at Hutch's heart.

"I know you do, pal. And you will soon…I promise."

"How'd I end up here, anyway?'

Hutch hesitated momentarily. He knew Starsky would eventually start asking questions, but, Hutch had hoped he could put off telling him too much for a few more days until he was stronger.

"You know you were shot in the parking lot at headquarters. Five times…the doctor said you should have been killed right away."

"But, I wasn't…guess I owe the big guy upstairs for that one."

"Right,...but, we were all lead to believe that you died on operating table." Hutch's voice cracked as the painful memories flooded his mind. He didn't want to relive those few weeks when he thought that Starsky was dead, but for Starsky's sake, he would.

"So, how did I end up here?" Starsky repeated.

"You can thank Joey Durniak for that. The feds were the ones who originally faked your death. In their usual bumbling way, they were trying to keep you alive and safe. They just went about it all ass-backward. When Joey found out through his own west coast connections, he stepped in and had you brought here under an assumed name and put in a private hospital that he owns. The doctor who has been treating you was there in Bay City when you were brought in. He owed Joey's father a favor, and that's how he got involved."

"So how'd you find out it was all a lie?"

"Believe it or not, it was Nicky. Joe had Nicky snatched too, both to keep him safe and hoping that having him here would help with your recovery. When that didn't work, Joey had him call your mom and tell her that you were both okay. He also sent your rings to your mom, and she immediately called Captain Dobey. Huggy is actually the one who pieced it together with Dobey's help."

"Where were you, partner?"

Hutch knew Starsky would not judge him so he was brutally honest. "I tried to crawl inside a bottle when I thought you were dead. I wanted to join you. I just didn't have the guts to eat a bullet. I was holed up on my grandfather's farm. My sister told Dobey and Huggy to look there first."

"So you came here and found me," Starsky said softly, finishing the story to his own satisfaction. "Does anybody back home know I'm still around?"

"Right now, nobody but Captain Dobey."

"What about my stuff? My apartment? My car?"

"Most of it's gone. I kept some of your stuff, and Huggy made a private deal with Merle to fix the tomato. I was going to just let Merle trash it."

"You were going to let my car die, too? That's cold, man…" Starsky smiled faintly to take the sting out of his words. "Thank goodness Huggy had more sense than you."

Hutch smiled back and stroked the back of Starsky's hand. He took the ice cream dish and set it aside. He noticed that Starsky's eyes were getting heavy as he exhausted the last reserves of his energy. "Sleep for now. We'll talk again tomorrow."

Starsky's eyes closed as if all he needed was Hutch's permission to rest. Hutch needed sleep himself, but he knew that he was too keyed up yet to rest. So, he sat there for a long time, just watching his best friend and partner sleep.

He was ready to doze off himself when Dr. McEntire entered the room. Hutch turned his attention to the doctor, waiting patiently for an update on Starsky's health.

"He's doing quite well. Better than I expected, actually. He's gaining weight, and his vital signs have all stabilized within a normal range. He's healing, a bit slower that I would like, but it can't be rushed. I got the results of the tests we ran on his stomach and lung. His stomach it still a bit touchy, as I'm sure you have both discovered. But with time, I expect it to heal, although he may have to make a few adjustments in his diet…cut back on the spicy foods and that sort of thing.

His lung is a bigger concern. There is a great deal of scar tissue, and it's unlikely that he will ever regain full lung capacity. The best he can hope for is between 85 and 90 percent. And he will be susceptible to colds and lung infections for the rest of his life. He will have to be careful because even a relatively mild cold could easily turn into pneumonia."

Hutch nodded his understanding of the Doctor's prognoses. "Anything else?"

"He will probably tire easily, get winded. He won't be able to run the way he used to or do as much strenuous activity. And he will never be able to survive another trauma like the one he's recovering from now. He will die the next time."

"In other words, he'll never be able to go back on the streets. He's washed up; his career is finished unless he wants to settle for a desk job," Hutch said.

Strangely, he felt a combination of sadness and relief at the thought. Even if it meant giving up his own career, Hutch wouldn't hesitate to do just that. He would never work the streets again. Not without Starsky as his backup.

Over the years, their lives had become so intertwined that they could never function independently as effectively as they did together. They provided each other's emotional support, shutting everyone else in their lives out to a certain degree. They needed each other to be complete. Hutch had never questioned their closeness or dependency on each other. Having grown up in a sterile, cold environment with emotionally distant parents who expected the most out of their children, but failed to provide the love both children craved so desperately, Hutch had accepted his relationship with Starsky and never questioned it.

Starsky had his own demons to contend with. Losing his father at such a young age had left him emotionally scarred. Then he had been sent away from his mother and younger brother to live with an aunt and uncle he barely knew in a totally foreign environment. That background, combined with two years in Viet Nam, the last 6 months of which were spent as a POW, had left him embittered and guarded, but not entirely broken.

Being roommates at the police academy had thrown them together at a time in their lives when they needed someone to rely on. Someone to trust. Someone to be there for them. They had fit together despite their obvious differences in personality and backgrounds.

The years on the force, in a highly stressful job, facing death on a daily basis, had drawn them even closer to each other, reinforcing their fierce dependency on each other in both their personal and professional lives.

Thinking that Starsky had died and that he was alone had only shown Hutch just how much he needed Starsky. He literally could not live without the man in his life. There was no sacrifice too great for Hutch to make to make sure that they were together.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Two weeks after awakening from his coma, Starsky took his first halting steps with Hutch by his side. He only made it part way across the room before his legs gave out, and Hutch caught him before he could fall. But, it was a start.

"I wanna try again," Starsky insisted as Hutch helped him back to his bed.

"Later," Hutch said firmly. "You need to rest for a little while first."

"All I've been doing is rest," Starsky said in an irritated voice. "Resting isn't getting things done."

"And if you try to rush it, you could end up jeopardizing all the progress you've made so far," Hutch pointed out.

He knew that patience was not one of Starsky's strong points. He tended to rush headlong into life, then sit back and ponder the consequences. It was that bold rashness that helped make him a good cop, but a lousy patient.

Starsky gave an exaggerated sigh as he settled back into the bed. He knew there was no arguing with Hutch when he made up his mind, especially when it came to Starsky's well being and health. Still, Starsky couldn't help a little pout.

Hutch chuckled softly.

"Save the pout, Gordo. It's not going to get you anywhere."

"Did anybody ever tell you that you're a bully?"

"Yeah…you. All the time, when you don't get your way." Hutch grinned. The familiar banter between them felt good. It had been a looked at Hutch and said somberly, "I'm not going to be a cop anymore, am I?"

"That's going to be up to the review board," Hutch said evasively.

"Come on, Hutch…you know as well as I do that I'm never gonna be the man I used to be. Not after what happened. And I'm sure as hell not cut out for a desk job. I start climbing the walls when we're stuck in the office catching up on our reports."

"There are other options," Hutch offered. "There's always the Academy."

"Yeah, right…" Starsky said with a laugh that quickly turned to a grimace of pain. He held up a hand to let Hutch know he was okay when the big blond moved to help him. "It's okay…just forgot I can't do that right now." He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "I don't think the Police Commissioner or Chief Ryan would approve of me butting a couple of cadet's heads together when they wouldn't listen or slamming one up against the wall if he had a smart mouth."

"Like you did, you mean?"

Starsky threw his partner a dark look. "Hey, I didn't have a smart mouth. I just didn't have time for some of those instructors who wanted to treat me like a kid when I'd spent two years in Nam and had already seen more action than they would in a lifetime."

"I can't argue with you there. Let's just take it one day at time for now and see what happens. Okay?"

Starsky nodded his head. "Sounds like a plan. I just want to get out of here and go back to Bay City."

"I know, and you will. It's just going to take a little more time. But, we'll get there." Hutch smiled. "How about trying a shower later?"

"Instead of a sponge bath?" Starsky grinned broadly. "That sounds like heaven."

"Hey," Hutch said pretending to be disappointed. "Don't you like it when I give you a sponge bath?"

"Let's just say I have a blonde with a slightly different build in mind when it comes to that kind of thing."

They shared a laugh, stopping when an aide came in with Starsky's lunch tray. She sat it on the bedside table and left. Hutch lifted the lid and Starsky's eyes lit up at the sight of a baked potato with butter, macaroni and cheese, and yogurt. It was still a soft diet, but in Starsky's eyes, it was real food instead of a liquid diet. Now, he could really enjoy the food his mother was bringing him every day.

"See," Hutch told him. "Things are looking up already."

The aide returned with a second tray for Hutch. Even though he could have a regular diet, he insisted on having the same diet as Starsky. He refused to eat something in front of his partner that Starsky could not yet eat. The two men ate their meal in silence.

Afterwards, Hutch helped Starsky into the bathroom where he disrobed. Hutch turned on the shower, adjusting the spray to a comfortable temperature before helping Starsky sit down on the shower chair provided. He stepped back, but stayed close enough to help if Starsky needed it. He watched as Starsky just sat there for several minutes enjoying the feeling of the water spraying down over his head and shoulders.

Starsky's surgical incisions were healed enough that no special protection needed to be taken. The scars were still an angry red with puckered edges, but both men knew that they would fade in time. The worst ones, on Starsky's chest, would be covered by his body hair. But they would always be there, a mute reminder of the miracle he had been given. The miracle of life.

Finally, Starsky reached out for the washcloth and liquid soap. He lathered up his torso, starting with his face and neck, then moving down to his chest and groin. When he glanced at Hutch mutely, Hutch smiled and reached for the rag. He quickly washed Starsky's back, legs and feet. He helped him rinse off, then assisted Starsky to his feet where Hutch dried him off. Grabbing a clean gown out of the cabinet, Hutch redressed his partner and helped him back to his bed.

Exhausted by the morning's activity, Starsky settled in for a nap while Hutch tended to some personal business of his own. When he had finished, Hutch stretched out on the second bed that had been put in the room for him and drifted off to sleep himself.

Rachel's arrival late that afternoon awakened them. She gave her son a hug and a kiss. Setting the foil-covered plate on the bedside table, she watched as Starsky unwrapped it, a huge smile on his face when he saw one of his favorite meals. His mother called it "The Paul Muni Special". It was a perfectly done roast with vegetables. Rachel had told Hutch once that it was the only way she could get Starsky to eat vegetables when he was a child.

"I talked to the doctor. He told me you're doing better. I suppose you'll be going back to California soon."

Starsky could hear the sadness in his mother's voice. He knew she would love it if he would move back to New York, but California had been his home longer than New York ever was. He had grown accustomed to the warm weather and mild winters. Bay City and Brooklyn were two completely separate worlds, and even though he called them both home, Bay City was where Hutch was. He had tried, unsuccessfully, for years to talk his mother into moving to California to be closer to him. But, she steadfastly refused. Brooklyn had been her home for over forty years and she had no intention of leaving. Her son wasn't the only Starsky with a stubborn streak.

"Not for awhile yet," Starsky said, avoiding the question. He knew that his mother didn't really expect an answer anyway.

"Well, then we will just make the most of whatever time we have left," Rachel said with a soft smile. She patted her son's hand fondly.

Hutch envied the relationship Starsky had with his mother. Thankfully, Rachel had enough love to include Hutch into her home and life. Mother and son had filled the void in his life to become his surrogate family.

Rachel turned her attention to Hutch as if, like her son, she was able to read his thoughts.

"How are you, dear? You look tired. You need to get some rest." She gestured at the plate of food. "Eat. You're like my David, too skinny…"

"I'll eat something later," Hutch promised. "I'm not hungry right now."

"You better grab something before this one here eats it all," Rachel teased them both. She knew that her son's appetite was far below norm at the moment.

"I'll save him some. I promise," Starsky stated with a modified snort.

Rachel didn't stay long. She knew that her son still tired quickly and, besides, Monday night was her bingo night. She kissed both men goodbye before she left, promising to return the next day.


	19. Chapter 19

**CHAPTER 19**

 **This is the last chapter of this little saga. I hope I did Kristy's idea justice.**

Two weeks later **,** Starsky was strong enough that the doctor decided he could return to Bay City. Rachel was disappointed to see her son leaving, but she knew it was time. She knew with Hutch at his side, he was in good hands. Their last night together was bittersweet, and a few tears were shed. Hutch lingered in the background, allowing mother and son to share their last evening together.

"I'm going to miss you," Rachel admitted with a tender smile.

"I know." Starsky smiled reassuringly. "But, we both knew this day was coming sooner or later. I love you, and I'll miss you too. But, Bay City is my home. It has been since I was fourteen."

"You have no idea how many nights I've regretted sending you away…" The sadness in her voice tugged at Starsky's heart.

"You did what you thought was best…and it was. If I'd stayed in New York, I'd probably have ended up another street punk just like Nicky."

"I tried so hard with your brother…but, he just wouldn't listen…and now it's too late."

"It's not your fault, Ma. Nicky made his own choices."

"A mother loves her children no matter what they become…but, as a mother, you also blame yourself when they turn out the way that Nickoli has. You ask yourself what you did wrong…were you a bad mother?"

"No, don't ever think that you were a bad mother," Starsky told her firmly as he grasped her hand tightly. "You had some hard choices to make, and you made the only ones you could at the time. I didn't understand that at the time but, I do now. I'm the man I am today because you were strong enough to send me away to save me from myself."

"When I thought you were dead and then Nicky disappeared too…I was so afraid I had lost both of my sons." A single tear fell down Rachel's cheek. "And it hurt so much…I just wanted to be with you both…I didn't think I could face the future alone…then I got the call from Nicky and your rings in the mail…and suddenly, there was hope…a miracle from God."

Unable to hold back any longer, Rachel began to cry heavily. Starsky gathered her in his arms and whispered comforting words of endearment in her ear. Hutch felt the burn of unshed tears in his own eyes. He felt like an intruder, eavesdropping on an intensely private moment between Starsky and his mother.

He locked eyes with his partner over Rachel's shoulder. Starsky smiled gently, consciously including Hutch in the moment. They had done their share of talking over the past few days, and Hutch had shared his own fears and insecurities.

Rachel composed herself and straightened up, brushing the traces of her tears from her face. "I'm sorry…you'll have to forgive a foolish old woman…"

"You're not foolish, and you're not old," Starsky told her.

"And you're a charmer just like your father. You're like him in so many ways."

Starsky smiled, but kept silent. All his life he'd heard how much he was like his father, both in appearance and in temperament. He had followed in his father's footsteps with pride. But, almost dying at an early age like his father had never been part of his plan. Coming so close, especially twice within the past year, had led him to believe that God still had something in mind for him.

Starsky may not have been as observant as he should have been, but he still celebrated the Hebrew high holy days. And he believed in God in his own way. As a child, Rachel had insisted that her sons attend Sabbath with her every week. Michael Starsky usually had to work, but he joined his family on the rare occasion when he had the day off.

When Starsky moved to California, he found himself in a curiously blended family with his uncle being Jewish and his aunt being a Gentile. The Holy days were still observed, but attending Sabbath was no longer required. Instead, he was exposed to the Gentile holidays of Christmas and Easter.

"Is Nicky back home?" Starsky asked.

"Yes, he came back last night. He said he met someone and was 'just getting to know' her." There was no bitterness in her words, just a weary acceptance of her youngest son's shortcomings. "I should go. It's getting late, and you have a long day tomorrow."

"I love you, and I promise to call every Friday, as usual," Starsky promised, keeping hold of his mother's hand as she stood up, then leaned back down to give him a final kiss goodbye.

"I love you too, baby." She let go of Starsky's hand and turned her attention to Hutch. She gave him a hug and a kiss. "I love you too. I know you will take care of him for me."

"You can count on it," Hutch promised her with a grin.

As she left the room, Hutch moved to take her place, sitting on the edge of the bed beside Starsky.

"She's right. Tomorrow's going to be along day. We should get some sleep."

Starsky nodded and both men prepared to turn in for the night. Tomorrow they would head home, to a life that would be different from the one they left behind. Too much had happened in the past few months to be ignored or forgotten. Starsky's future as a cop was still in question, but no matter how things turned out, the one thing that would never change would be the two of them, united as one, for the rest of their lives. Me and Thee…the motto they had lived by and would continue to live by, side by side.

THE END


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